So the stage was set. Friday night, kids in bed and a night on my own to watch Tv and play on the consoles with some Magners. What could go wrong ? So I switched the TV on which was on Sky news and yes you guessed it the hide and seek championship was drawing to an end. Ive been drawn in by the Moat fugitive drama unfolding on what seemed like 24/7 rolling news coverage. So there I was sat glued to the TV, flicking between BBC and Sky to se if they has any exclusive footage of more police cars screeching away and locals trying to get on the news. Being the nerd I am I was also on Twitter and Facebook at the same time seeing what was being posted on there. Rothbury where Moat was finally found and finished himself of must be a technology backwater as nobody was tweeting from there. Normally when there is a good news story you can get tweets which are faster than the actual news and unfortunately for us Moat had ditched his mobile phones although that didnt stop one Twitter imposter @Raoul_Moat1 (now removed) saying “Me fucking Newcastle Brown was chilling nicely in the river before this lot turned up man pet” So the night wore on and so did the standoff. The news people needed a new angle. Then the almighty god gave us a gift from heaven. Ex England footballer Paul Gascoigne turned up. He reckoned he new Moat from his time on the doors in Newcastle. Audio from Gazza speaking to a radio station has him slightly pissed to say the least. Gazza’s kind streak shone through as he brought Moat a chicken, some beer, a mobile phone and something to keep him warm, awwww blesss and then Gazza disappeared into the night as quick as he came, or did he simply just slump over at the police block after saying “Yer I knowed ‘im a few yeahr back, leyk.” “Are you confusing Raoul Moat with Sheryl, Paul?” “Aye. Could well be man. Whear am I?” So with one Geordie legend present Twitter went wild with suggestions of others on the way. “Spuggy from Byker Grove has arrived at the scene saying she is a friend of Raoul Moat.” and “Now Jossie out of Jossie’s Giants has turned up with a flask of tea claiming they used to go to the Metty Centre together.” I run out of cider and decided to call it a night just as Sky’s Kay Burley came on. I had a feeling her presence would be enough to tip Moat over the edge and I woke up in the morning to the news it had. First the police said no taser’s would be used. Then it comes out that they did taser him and Moat shot himself. Wonder what else they are hiding and I wonder how much overtime was booked and how many will go off with stress in the future due to the events of the past week or so ? Thankfully nobody else got injured and we now need something else to fill the news.
So whilst putting the kids to bed they wanted to play a game so we played “people” a game which involves figures of people and playing house etc. The joys of having two girls means no WWE bed wrestling or indoor sponge footy but a nice girly game of people. So we set the houses up and all had a few figures and pets each. They then designated who I was in the game. As you can see below the designated me the man on the right. Now I am losing my hair but not that bad and also I only grew a porn star muzzi last year to raise money for prostate cancer and I was a bit offended to be allocated this figure as me. I was that upset that I was going to go in the loft and bring down my Han Solo Star Wars figure and demand that I was him or I wasnt playing anymore. It was then I realised I am nearly 37 and it wouldnt of made any difference as the “game” wasnt mine anyway. Gotta love kids rules. The game might not be mine but as King Fay the kids where ushered off to bed as I had an extra 15 mins playing people and designated myself a new slimmer younger and somebody with a full head of hair figure.
So Saturday morning came and yes you guessed it a final Moat update when Elizabeth asked what was going on. She knew a man was on the run and so I said they had caught him. It was at that point I forgot she could read. She told me “he is dead and that she was happy as he cant do anymore naughty things.” We then had a small debate on the current economic crisis and the effects of the conservative government policy of cuts and increased VAT. Charlotte as seen below was busy doing her own thing. Nice to see my kids have picked up my habits of current affairs and the like of an odd tipple.
Fay x x
Edit almost forgot this gem.