Month: March 2011

R.I.P Irene Mabel Marsh

Posted on by faymondo

So today I read in the Liverpool Echo that John Moores University is to sell off its historic IM Marsh campus. The site will be bought by developers,with the university transferring the faculties for Education, Community and Leisure that are currently based there to the city centre. The university has confirmed the move will result in redundancies but in a memo to staff said: “it is far too early in the process to go into detail.” First the boring historic bit. Irene Mable Marsh, Founder of ‘Liverpool Physical Training College’ in 1900.  This became LJMU’s IM Marsh Campus and today is a well-respected centre for teacher eduction, food and consumer studies, dance, adventure tourism and sports development. Some great pic from the 1920’s and 1930’s can be found HERE So what’s the big fuss over this place going ? Well from the age of about 10 to 17 I spent a large chunk of my life on the campus. Security was lax to say the least . I moved house and lived right by the site and cut through it every day on my way back from Sudley Juniors (In the days when parents let you do stuff and were not wrapped in cotton wool like todays kids) So from the early days of playing cricket on there trying to emulate Ian Botham to bunking on the tennis courts every Wimbledon (along with the rest of the kids in Aigburth) the I.M Marsh (Or the I.M as we called it) has a huge place in my life. As I grew older (15 ha ha ha older eh ! ) the I.M became our local pub and indeed to this day I hold the record for necking a one litre bottle of Merrydown Cider in two swigs. I also seen my wife to be on the I.M back in the day but it would be some 10 years later before she finally got the catch of her life. Early summers were spent in the I.M at the local playscheme and I can even remember going on the outdoor ski slope it once had sitting on any kind of plastic road sign we could rob to get added speed. Once a mate of mine came off and a bit of the brush type surface had ripped up and he went right over it resulting in a nice gash to the leg and that was the end of his ambition to be the scouse Franz Klammer. I’ve been on most roofs in that place and now look on in sheer horror at the height of some of them and as we our years advanced the female students who were living on site became a target for us. First with fireworks every November the 5th as we had our own coalition forces attack on the high rise they lived in. Soon it was to get in the high rise and seduce a few of them. Even to modern day I have taken my eldest daughter there to swim and whilst she was swimming I would take my youngest for a walk around the campus with many a memory being evoked from the endless playing of sports (wasnt just footy in them days) Indeed we had our own olympics on the gravel running track and sand pit it once had. Later memories would be of dodgy songs we used to get drunk to (Londonbeat ,and M.C.Hammer  to name a couple) I still even play footy up there sometimes on a Tuesday night. So for what is coming up to 30 years the I.M.Marsh has played some kind of part in my life. It will be sad to see it go. Hopefully they will keep some of the old buildings and turn them into flats. But once its been flattened I will no longer be able to so easily recall those memories of the past once it’s a modern housing estate. Perhaps I could buy a house there and claim a bit of the I.M.Marsh as mine. I know i’m a sentimental old fool and with these changes people are losing jobs but it will be a sad day for me when it goes. Perhaps I need to get up there with a bottle of Merrydown this summer and have one last piss up on there in memory to Irene Mable Marsh.

I.M Marsh campus

Peace

Fay x x

A Fay on the dole, wanted one spare thomahawk missile.

Posted on by faymondo

So the news quickly moves on and the Japanese Tsunami finds itself as todays chip wrapper and the attack on Gaddafi takes centre stage. I’m not going to ramble on here about the attacks too much but in short we should not be dropping bombs on Libya. Plenty of other countries in the world with crazy regimes killing their own over the last decade but left to their own devices. So why bomb Libya ? Black Gold, Texas Tea yep gotta be oil. So at a time when our government is telling us that we must all cut back including our armed forces we decide to let a few thomahawk missiles loose. I mean they cost at least £300,000 a pop and that’s before we’ve delivered them to the doorstep of Mr Gaddafi. News is that our planes went all the way to Libya to not even drop the bombs on one mission. Due to the cuts do we have planes with no bombs ? Is that better than bombs with no planes ? So with jobs being cut left right and centre and council budgets being slashed Mrs Fay got told her job will be ending in June. Another victim of Cameron’s cuts ,this time in the department for work and pensions. I suppose working for the job centre you at least get to see what jobs are on offer for when the job centre fuck you off, every cloud eh ! I too was sweating on my contract with Wakefield council. It is up at the end of March and was expecting a decision this week. By the time I had logged off on Thursday I had heard no news. So logged into work on Saturday to check my mails and there was one with the subject contract. So what did it say ? Was I going to be job hunting in April and the possibility of both me and Mrs Fay being on the dole in June. I was quite looking forward to just sitting off with the missus smoking weed all day and watching Jeremy Kyle. Mrs Fay could get some special pyjamas to wear and then when she gets her dole money go out in her curlers to pick the kids up from school, oh hang on a min she done that on Friday !! The good news was that my contract had been extended until the end of June. So there is still an outside chance that Me and Mrs Fay can get the chance to live like doleites and have a summer in the back garden drinking cheap grog, getting a nice tan (assuming we get a summer) and catching up on all my sky plus. So keep an eye on this blog as I might have to hold a bring and buy sale to sell all my technology I own to make ends meet for Summer 2011. Note the in-laws have already bagzied the lap top ! Maybe I might be lucky and come across a knock off thomahawk missile to keep me in beer and M&S finest munchies all summer.

So this Saturday March 26th there is a march in London. The March for the Alternative is expected to be the largest TUC event for decades and the first national mobilisation against the spending cuts viewed as unfair, too deep and too quick by a majority of voters. http://marchforthealternative.org.uk/ I was hoping to go on this march. It’s all too easy spouting off on here in the comfort of my living room and not really do anything. As it is I wont be going on the march (too busy spouting off here in the comfort of my living room) no I have a wedding reception in the evening to go to and when floating the idea out to Mrs Fay I might go I got one of those looks that suggested no amount of flowers, gifts and chocolates could get me out of the wedding. So my dreams of going down to London and the high possibility of losing my kettling virginity thanks to the met police have ben dashed. On the bright side it does stop the chance of me being spotted on Sky News in the wrong place at the wrong time and forever being tarnished as a violent protester. It could also save me from a random beating or even death from a friendly police officer. So a few of my old council and union work mates will be heading down on the train on Saturday morning and hopefully the revolution starts with them. Shall we call it an uprising against our leader. If that is the case can we then expect the United Nations to pass a resolution for the rest of the world to attack us and try to take out David Cameron if needs be ? Nah didn’t think so. I’ll be looking out for my old works banner on the news.

Peace

Fay x x

Bob Greaves indicates the passing of time.

Posted on by faymondo

So news broke last night that Bob Greaves the face of Granada Reports when I was growing up had died. You know you’re getting on when the people you grew up watching on TV start popping their clogs. That together with the children of sports stars you admired are making it into first teams etc. So on checking about Bob Greaves I came across this web site http://www2.tv-ark.org.uk/itvnorthwest/granadatv/news.html Scary how many news presenters I remember from that page. Back to Bob Greaves and I finally found the clip that he was most famous for, see below. Another joy of getting old is moaning about how football used to be and saying “In my day………” I am now sprouting hairs in places I thought hairs didn’t grow from. I have already had one cartilage operation and I think another knee is on the way out. I’ve lost one parent and the other one has done mighty well to still be here today. Next up will be my daughters hitting teenage years and all the angst that goes with that. So looking back to the days when I was watching Bob Greaves with the only care in the world on my shoulders was where was my next pack of Tudor crisps and can of top deck lager and lime gonna come from.

Just a little note from my last post entitled “Tsunami porn” I can get all manner of stats and reports re my blog. One such report is search engine terms. These are terms people used to find your site. So to my surprise search terms coming up are “tsunami porn” and “japan tsunami porn” Lets take the first phrase first. What is Tsunami porn ? I can only imagine its people having sex whilst a tsunami is taking place. So is it a case of as soon as the sea withdraws you get down to it and just at the last minute you pull your pants up and get out of the way of the wave and leg it upstairs ? Not exactly my idea of safe sex. Has anybody actually pulled this off (or pulled off to it) Does it exist ? Dare I type it into google to do some research on for my blog (ahemmm) Imagine the disgust Mrs Fay would feel if I forgot to delete my internet history and she sussed I had visited tsunami lesbians dot com. If the first search term want bad enough hows about getting more specific and searching for “Japan tsunami porn” Talk about porn hot off the press. Whats wrong with good old-fashioned Indian Ocean tsunami porn from 2004.  The Chile version from 2010 or the vintage Alaska edition from 1964 (Little bit of tsunami history for you there) I don’t make to want mock the tsunami as my heart goes out to those affected (not my prayers as I don’t believe in god) but I have decided to hold out for that special DVD. Like “Fly Fishing” by J.R.Hartley and more recently the very rare “Pulse and Thunder” twelve-inch record by Day V Lately I will tomorrow be using my yellow pages Iphone application to hunt for the illusive “Japanese Nuclear Reactor Tsunami Porn” Blu ray DVD.

So today was the start of the Cheltenham horse racing festival. What was a busy time when I worked in Ladbrokes. After being lucky enough to escape Ladbrokes ( I quite liked the job, but the hours were shitty) it was onto Liverpool City Council were Cheltenham was marked with three afternoons off on the ale having a good bet. I don’t bet these days but do take part in a Cheltenham tipster competition to keep an interest in the event. Couldnt think today though that how many horse owners are really fat bastards. I can only assume they don’t have a cheeky ride on their horses in their spare time. Also I spotted a quite unfortunate horse race title today. It was the 2.40 race which was sponsored by the Stewart Family Spinal Research. Very good indeed until I noticed it was a handicap race and so was called the Stewart Family Spinal Research Handicap Chase (Grade 3) Further cheap gags at the expense of handicap people refused at this point (that’s why I don’t blog drunk)

Peace

Fay x x

Tsunami porn

Posted on by faymondo

Wow what a day. As a self confessed geography geek and the proud owner of a Bsc in Human Geography. How I ever got that Bsc is still open to debate as most of my study time was spent in the 051 and Garlands. But back on topic and the breaking news this morning was of the Japanese tsunami and the early footage of the wave hitting the coast and moving inland. Now this is like geography hardcore porn to me but as the wave swept in and swept away villages , houses and cars you could only hope that nobody was in them but the loss of life will only increase on a large scale over the next few days. I dont think a tsunami has ever been recorded from a helicopter and other footage just blew me away. My 6 year old daughter was watching with me and after some explanation she seems nearly sure that (a) we dont get big earthquakes and (b) the wave wasnt about to sweep up the Mersey anytime today but went to school OK. So as the rest of the day went on I watched with anticipation as the wave moved across the world but wasnt as bad a feared. Part of me was wanting it to hit Hawaii big time and watch it live as it happened. This must be some kind of morbid curiosity kicking in. The same kind of thing that I get when a plane crashes. Maybe ive got issues. So this evening I sat down with Elizabeth who wanted to see more of todays news. She soon decided that Sky News was her fave channel from Sky, BBC, CNN and Fox. Barak Obama the came on and I asked her “Do you know who that is ?” She replied “no” I then being her father gave her some knowledge ” That is the president of America who is the most powerful man in the world” To which she replied ” Is he a wizard or something” Kids eh. Later on as the Queens statement was read out Elizabeth then started to say along the lines of “I’d like to say were not really bothered as we havent had a tsunami” I can just see the queen speaking “It is with great joy that all of my kingdom is dry and my subjects are safe” then in the background Prince Philip can be heard saying “Hope those bloody nips can swim”

So as a new day dawns and indeed a new Japan dawns (bit deep that eh) bit by bit the nuclear power plant that was OK isnt. A small exclusion zone was implemented. Next it was just a bit of radioactive steam to be let off and now the latest is reports of radiation levels over 1000 times normal. The exclusion zone is now six miles and the Fukushima nuclear power plant is part under water. No doubt as with the rest of the earthquake/tsunami story this one has still got a bit to run yet. What would be the implications if this thing was to blow ? I was watching a bit of Superman III on Sunday on Ch5 and there was a refinery fire and superman flew to the local lake then breathed so hard an entire lake froze. He then picked it up and dropped it on the fire and it went out. Oh superman where are you in our hour of need.

So as I continue to watch the news and no doubt will be glued to it over the next few days as conventional internet porn is replaced by new tsunami footage and of numerous “money shots” as it hits land it made me feel safe in the knowledge I am British. We dont get tsunamis but are lucky enough to have a bastard government making cuts left, right and centre. Indeed live in a city where gunshots are becoming a regular occurrence ever nearer to home. What about the tsunami of orange females wearing pyjamas. The gangs of black shellsuited lads with hands down their pants grabbing a bollock (maybe they are just very aware of testicular cancer) rising unemployment, attacks on public pensions and the age of pension being increased. For fucks sake even Liverpool and Everton football club are shite these days. Come on wave take me, take us all and we can have a new start. A new world order. Good job I had a spare pair of Peppa Pig armbands and was the sole survivor (apart from the select band of women I had in a safe place to start all over again)  Be warned Lord Fay now rules…………………..

Deadbelgian and international womens day

Posted on by faymondo

So no blog for a bit so lets catch up with last Saturdays night out. The event of the night was a very intimate gig upstairs in the Ship & Mitre to see Deadbelgian (Web site here.) Deadbelgian are a 4 piece band with Fionnuala Dorrity – vocals, ukulele, guitar. Matthew Wood – accordion, piano, vocals. Andy Delamere – percussion, vocals and Simon James – sax, flute, clarinet, mandolin, vocals. Singing in a mixture of English and French they play the songs of Jacques Brel with occasional forays into his contemporaries and those influenced by him….at the moment the set includes two Jake Thackray songs. So with the gig a lock out it was an excellent performance from the band who my father in law suggested we go and see. Fionnuala had a very good vocal range and with the upstairs of the Ship & Mitre in an oldish art deco style you could of been transported to a bar in Belgium or France and forgot you were upstairs in a real ale pub in Liverpool. Post gig it was a pint in Dr Duncan’s were we debated if the tiled room was original or not. It was a split decision and for the record I think its jarg. A final pint in the Penny Farthing. As we approached there were three bouncers on the door (never a good sign) but me and the father in law decided to go in. Good job we did really as there was one other person in there. Where do the elder generation of Liverpool now drink ? A saturday night rounded off with the traditional Lobster Pot and a night of cultural music and Polish beer (Tyskie again) enjoyed.

So after an excellent win from Liverpool on Sunday everything came down with a bump with the tribute to Dean Richards (Ex footballer) who died age 36 from a brain tumour. Wolves provided a fitting tribute and his wife and kids came on the pitch for the minutes applause. So I cracked open a can of beer and sat watching TV all Sunday night. Last up was the 700th edition of Patrick Moore. Judging by the size of him I reckon he will explode by around the 736th episode creating a new asteroid belt which could be named after him. The show took us into his garden and showed his telescopes in his garden in Selsey on the south coast of England. Couldnt help think he wouldnt have any telescopes in his garden if he lived in Liverpool.

In other news today its pancake day. I enjoyed some of Clitheroe’s finest sausages and banged some oven chips in. But more importantly it is also international womens day. Each year around the world, International Women’s Day (IWD) is celebrated on March 8. Hundreds of events occur not just on this day but throughout March to mark the economic, political and social achievements of women. Organisations, governments and women’s groups around the world choose different themes each year that reflect global and local gender issues. So im gonna settle down and watch by best of Richard Keys and Andy Gray DVD and with it being pancake day there is an extra load of dishes for Mrs Fay to do. So sisters unite and burn your bras. When is it international mens day I asked Mrs Fay. Its mens day every day ! On a more serious note Suffragettes campaigned for women’s right to vote. The word ‘Suffragette’ is derived from the word “suffrage” meaning the right to vote. International Women’s Day honours the work of the Suffragettes, celebrates women’s success, and reminds of inequities still to be redressed. Ive said this before on my blog. Women use your vote and get rid of the shite thats in charge now

Peace x x

Fay

This international womens day blog was sponsored by Henry The Hoover, Fairy Liquid, Ariston washing machines in association with Persil and Morphy Richards turbosteam irons.  (Looks like im in the spare bed tonight)