Deacon Blue live @ Echo arena

So Friday night and day 24 of no ale and it all came crashing down with a quick pint at Damon’s on the way to watch Deacon Blue live at the Liverpool Echo Arena. Deacon Blue’s gig in Liverpool are most probably the biggest audience they play to these days and indeed must be like a little pension for them. It wasnt the full arena as the stage was forward but still a good couple of thousand at £40 a pop isn’t a bad little earner for all involved. As Ricky Ross said at the start of the night its the “Scouse ball” I still find it strange how many younger people attend the gig, obviously passed down from their parents. The scouse ball had people dressed up like its ladies day at the races (no complaints from me) but there is also an element of drunkenness from a minority although from past Deacon Blue piss ups sorry I mean concerts it wasnt as bad as previous years. Well that’s the moan out of the way and after a few more ciders it was concert time. I did have the chance to see Deacon Blue at Glastonbury but for the first time in my life turned them down. I was to have a brief affair with The Chemical Brothers but I was now back in Deacon Blues swaying arms (first and last pun) Watching Deacon Blue for me is like my own personal episode of “This is your life” Nearly every song I can relate to a time and a place. From “Raintown” doing my echo paper round at the tender age of 14. “Queen Of The New Year” sitting off at the swings on Kelton Park estate onto “Your Swaying Arms” one of my mates mums bedroom (not as bad as it sounds !!! ) and numerous others that I wont bore you with. Memories so fresh but when you analyse them some over 20 years old eeeek. So as ever Deacon Blue never fail to deliver and belting out there hits the crowd were loving it. One crowd rendition of “Loaded” I spotted the keyboard player James Prime stand up and just look at the crowd and raise a little smile. Must be nice to get to a point in your music career when you can just enjoy it for what it is and not be part of some big corporate machine. I always enjoy Ricky’s stories into certain songs and also when they include songs within a song. You also cant beat James Prime playing the hammond keyboard possibly my favourite instrument after a pint glass. The gig still doesn’t beat the one I managed to see in London when they played the “Raintown” album from start to finish and  then some more hits. That night we stayed behind to finish our drinks and were one of the last out of the concert area. We walked up the stairs and there was music playing and we still wanted a drink. We nodded to the bouncers and walked into the bar at Scala in Kings Cross. We ordered our drinks and went to pay and the bar man said its OK it’s a free bar ? It then dawned we had blagged our way into the concert after party (It was to celebrate the 20th anniversary of Raintown) So not only free drinks we got to meet and chat with the band who laughed at our bunking in. The fact that we honestly didn’t have a clue what we were going into past the bouncers with a polite nod and hello of innocence had got us in. But back to matters of Deacon Blue present and there is meant to be some new material on the way and for those of you who don’t know Ricky and Lorraine released an album a few year back. Not Deacon Blue style but still worth a listen http://www.mcintoshross.com/ So after a few post concert pints it was The Botan burger bar for munchies and we headed off home. We had to take a detour due to Aigburth Road being shut by the cricket club as a man was wanting to set himself alight STORY HERE So with no kids and the chance of a lie in I was gutted to find myself up this morning at 8:20. But on the bright side I can enjoy more of this glorious summers day and I am listening to my Deacon Blue live at the Liverpool Empire CD. So here is my last Deacon Blue review old blog and I leave you with a small clip of Raintown I recorded and a shitty picture from my phone from last night. A nice night out for me and Mrs Fay and a wedding tonight to make it a rare Friday and Saturday night out combo. At this rate its back to the 051 and Cream next week !!

Peace

Fay x x x

Liverpool on the waterfront and mobility scooters.

So late Sunday afternoon and I decided to treat the wife and kids to an evening out to Liverpool on the waterfront (I was dying to see this but didnt want to be Billy no mates) We also brought along Helen who is now our cultural child from down the road despite being 35, can I claim child benefit for her. She does have her uses though as we got cheaper train tickets on her rail card. So we got off at Moorfields and walked down towards the Pier Head. A quick stop at the Spar for drinks and munchies. I Was so tempted to get a few cans of cider and acting with class put them under the buggy but diet coke it was. Tonight will mark 3 weeks without a bevvy and that the longest I have gone since 2001 when I managed about 7 weeks as a new years resolution. So we got down to the Pier Head and as mentioned in previous blogs it was again windy, possibly the windiest place in Liverpool. So it was a quick walk around the museum looking at the lamb banana’s. Lucky we didn’t want to go in as it had closed early due to electrical problems (only been open less than a week !! ) So before the main show there was a small procession of various weird arty things and some nice lights on the “three graces” So after a small concert by a band called “Six toys” they were OK http://www.6ixtoys.co.uk/  and they even threw in an Amy Winehouse tribute (Lets not go there) So the time had come for the main event and the Liver Buildings were to be projected onto to make them look like you had never seen before. The Liver Buildings were 100 years old last week (only just over 4 years older than me nan !! ) The history of Liverpool was to be projected onto them. It was a stunning visual display and I was glad I got to see this. The only critique was that once the Beatles were shown it sort of jumped forward to present day (giant mechanical spider, see video below) I suppose it wasnt gonna show the downfall of the city but it could of covered the riots and threw a cheeky picture of Maggie Thatcher up so we could all boo and even the odd footy success for both teams. After a small break the show then went onto the new museum of Liverpool life. Not quite as spectacular as the first part of the show but none the less clever (even if the kids did find it a bit boring) So a quick dash for the train home and a nice Sunday evening out, much better than sitting in with six cans playing on the xbox and finishing off with some tasty M&S munchies. A little bit of video I shot is below. You can make out The Beatles playing on the ledge below the clock.

So a lot’s happened in the news since my last blog but deciding not to touch them with a bargepole. My sympathy to all families who lost loved ones wether it be from a madman or a cocktail of drugs and booze. In a previous blog I mentioned my dads new mobility scooter Bank Holiday theme park visit with a difference. In the news today.  A man who was hit by a train travelling at 100mph after his mobility scooter got stuck on a level crossing in Essex has escaped with only minor injuries. Paramedics were called to the crossing at Church Street in Kelvedon, near Colchester, at about 11:00 BST. The man, in his 40s, was taken to Broomfield Hospital, Chelmsford. “We believe the man was struck on the level crossing on a mobility scooter and amazingly received minor injuries,” said East of England Ambulance Service. A lucky man indeed only to be coughing up for a new pair of undies out of his disability benefit. When I seen the headline it reminded me of my dad who managed to plough straight into the main door at his local Tesco’s. My dad was expecting the door to open automatically but alas it didnt and a head on collision was the result. A Tesco worker came out and accused my dad of speeding. Like a red rag to a bull my dad pointed out with a top speed of 4 mph I think it might be your door which was at fault. In true Meldrew style (yes thats where I get it from) my dad managed to blag some free groceries from Tesco for his inconvenience (cheaper than the whiplash claim he was gonna pursue otherwise)  I’d of called the bizzies got the breathalyser out and banged 3 points on his licence ha ha ha.

Peace

Fay x x x

My bronze wedding anniversary and a weird nipple.

So the 19th of July 2003 and the day the lucky lady called Claire Jayne Runacus managed to get her claws into me for keeps. I jest of course but I am referring to my wedding day. So yesterday was our 8 year anniversary. A bit more research reveals it is indeed the bronze anniversary. So in keeping with tradition it was my honour to take Mrs Fay out for a meal. With my eating habits this meant only one place and gourmet burger in Liverpool one. I demolished a large burger and chips but there was a difference this time and that was no bottle of bud to accompany the meal but instead a bottle of diet coke. Yes it was day 15 of not drinking and another test as it is the first time I have been out and attempted not to drink. To be honest it wasnt too bad with the meal despite Mrs Fay 100% not helping me by yes you guessed it having a bottle of Bud. It was then out for a romantic stroll to walk past the new Liverpool museum of life that had opened that day and in true Pier Head style the wind was gusting as it seems to 365 days a year down there. A quick walk around the Albert Dock and into the Blue Bar I will cut the story short by saying we went into another two boozers after that and I managed to stay on the diet coke. It does put a dampener on your night not having a bevvy and I missed out on the delights of 8 pints and chip barm from the Lobster Pot on the last train home (and I wonder why my pants are tight !! ) So now into day 16 without a drink (you can’t tell it’s not bothering me at all can you ?) I have decided that a life with no drink is a life not worth living (Hello my name is Neil and i’m a recovering alcoholic) So with a Deacon Blue concert lined up I have decided that I have no other option but to have a few pints for social reasons only (ahem) and instead of counting the days off the grog I can now start the countdown until the next drink. T-Minus 9 days and counting. So me and the other half enjoyed our wedding anniversary and look forward to the Deacon Blue concert and possibly a wedding the night after but babysitters have become as hard a task as a cat burying a shit on a marble floor ? Happy anniversary Mrs Fay and here’s to the next 8 years x x P.S I was gonna get you a present to symbolise our bronze wedding but they had run out of fake bake in Boots and judging by many scouse girls thats more orange than bronze.

So onto the weird nipple and thankfully not related at all to my wedding anniversary. This time a story from The Daily Mirror (are we allowed to read that i’m losing track of all this) A third nipple has been discovered on the foot of a young woman – with medical staff believing the case may be the first of its kind. Up to five per cent of people are thought to suffer from the condition although most extra nipples tend to be located above the waist. The report reads: “A 22-year-old woman sought medical care for a lesion in the plantar region of her left foot, a well-formed nipple surrounded by areola and hair.” How can I lower the tone after such a romantic tale above ? Welcome to Faymondo’s blog. I imagine if you have a foot fetish that this is the pinnacle of your fetish as its sort of a buy one get one free on the go. Not quite sure how you would react if you had pulled this lovely lady and stumbled across an extra nipple, mind you she might decide to get her own back on the male species and keep her socks on during sex. So as ever in the interests of valued research and in the aim of educating (and a blatant attempt to get more traffic for my blog) I include a couple of pictures of this saucy foot.

Peace

Fay x x x

The curse of Jeremy Cunt

So today amidst all the now what seems daily fall out from the News Of The World hacking story the curse of Jeremy Cunt hit again. I am of course on about the culture secretary Jeremy Hunt. This time it was the turn of Sky News Jon Craig who is Chief Political Correspondent for Sky was hit for the second time with the curse of Jeremy Cunt. Other notable broadcasters to fall victim to the curse of Jeremy Cunt include BBC Radio 4’s Jim Naughtie and on the same day later on Andrew Marr. Now I reckon this is a bit of a side bet going on with political journo’s and others who throw so much in the pot each week and when somebody gets away with the cunt gaff they claim the pot. There are footballers called Nicky Hunt and Stephen Hunt who I have never recalled being called cunt in error. So below are the clips of the curse of Jeremy Hunt so far

Just for the record Jeremy Hunt is a cunt based on this opinion on the Hillsborough disaster. In June 2010, Hunt attracted controversy for suggesting football hooliganism played a part in the death of 96 football fans in the Hillsborough disaster; when in reality lack of police control and the presence of terraces and perimeter fences were established as the causes of the tragedy. He later apologised saying “I know that fan unrest played no part in the terrible events of April 1989 and I apologise to Liverpool fans and the families of those killed and injured in the Hillsborough disaster if my comments caused any offence.”

So with this news of the world story growing new wings day by day I think it is now safe to assume that every big news story over the last ten years will involve some kind of hacking and blagging from most if not all the newspapers. It’s nice to see some pressure on the Murdoch Empire and for the record I did buy the News Of The World (Yes I know people think it’s the sunday Sun) I did indeed buy it on Sunday (I was going to spew it after the mid-week revelations) but as you might tell from previous blogs I am a sucker for retro and it was for once quite an interesting read documenting the papers history and a cracking piece of sports journalism by Andy Dunn. I await with interest where this story will go and what new revelations will come out. It seems some of the police are bent (no shit Sherlock) and will it be enough to topple Cameron ? It will all pan out over the next few weeks/months. I actually got a phone call from news international this morning confirming that my phone messages had been hacked and thankfully nothing of interest came out but they had bugged my phone and revealed 76 calls to Pizza Park over the last 6 months and a total of 48 pounds worth of plain hamburgers and 78 large portions of fries had been bought along with litres of diet coke. So I leave you with a picture of Jeremy Cunt Hunt trying to show just how big a cunt he is !

Peace

Fay x x x

I dont think I will ever get away with using the word cunt so much in a blog again.

Transport, we are going backwards (or nowhere in my car ! )

So today around 4ish I sat my two daughters (age 3 & 6) and made them watch what was the last ever take off from a space shuttle. I remember as a young boy in the early 80’s being fascinated by the space shuttle and perversely more fascinated watching “newsround” on one January day back in 1988 when the Challanger space shuttle exploded. I even remember where I was when the Columbia shuttle disintegrated on re-entry in 1993 (Up at my mum and dads for the record) I thought it was a boring dad type thing to do to force the kids to watch this historic event but as it stands it looks like there is more chance of my kids taking me for a legal bevvy before the next U.S spacecraft is ready. I will indeed let the kids watch live (if they can) the final landing of the shuttle in 12 days time as the space shuttle programme is finished for good and there goes one of my things to see (shuttle launch) in the dustbin forever. So it’s over to China or less so India to put a man on the moon. How exciting would that be, having not been alive for the original moon landings (did we ever get there ? ) I hope to see it live one day. So today marked “one small step for man and no more leaps into mankind until NASA gets funding for a new rocket” So is mankind going backwards in its pursuit of travel ? It was the last decade when it was possible to fly to America and land earlier than you took off on Concorde (Thats a real life TARDIS in my eyes) indeed the record time for the fastest transatlantic airliner flight was from London Heathrow to New York JFK on 7 February 1996 by British Airways’ G-BOAD in 2 hours, 52 minutes, 59 seconds from takeoff to touchdown. ( I love stats ! ) But now it will be impossible to fly from the UK to the USA in a man-made time machine and hop in a space shuttle and be in space in a flash. Progress eh, at least the museums have some great items to view.

Staying on transport and my car is currently as mobile as a Concorde and when fired up lets out more smoke than a space shuttle launch. Over two weeks of in and out the garage and this time a Vauxhall part has arrived today and back in she goes on Monday (I call it a she because she is a temperamental bitch and costs a fortune to keep going and like a wife is due a trade in at any moment for a younger sexier model ! ) Lets hope at the god knows what time of asking that ********* ******* on ********** Road can sort the bloody thing out. Mrs Fay already pissed off at having to sign on every two weeks has had to travel on the bus (yes the fucking bus) several times this week for the school run and she was quoted as saying “Quite frankly one should not have to travel like this, why I even have to sit next to other people” Maybe she can kill two birds with one stone and get a job as a bus driver and get us all discount travel. On second thoughts jib that as have you seen the state of any woman bus driver you come across. If not your missing out on a large man in knickers and your typical female butch lesbian hockey goalkeeper. Cant beat a good stereotype but feel free to post a picture of a pin up female bus driver or hockey goalie if you come across one.

So tonight brings the start of another attempt to kick the grogg for a bit for health reasons. Dont worry folks there is nothing to worry about but rest assured if I am given some bad news I will let you know on here and we can set up a just giving page and raise enough money to send me on an all expenses trip around the Sayers factory. Well I have passed the first hurdle and that time period post 7 pm on a Friday night after a hard week at work when you just start twitching for that hard earned drink you deserve. Just diet coke tonight but when getting my diet coke I caught a flash of a bottle of Magners. There it was covered in cold perspiration, looking like an 18 year old out in town on a saturday night wearing next to nothing. You know the one wearing a short dress with a shapely figure and large bust caught out on a cold night with “footy studs” showing and a blingy gold necklace on. Ooops I was meant to be describing the Magners bottle then and so the curves on that bottle of Magners were shouting at me and never mind its sublime neck topped off in gold foil. I looked at it lovingly like it was the first girl I wanted to kiss and just like that experience the door was shut in my face and the dream was over, all be it a fridge door this time.

Peace

Fay x x x

Happy birthday blog, Faymondo footy and Star Wars memorabilia

So the crazy rambling of this blog reaches two years old. Was it really that long since my first blog As is now tradition the blog gets a new look as its birthday time, a bit like getting some birthday clothes of yer mum and dad. I was gonna make a blog up around my phone being hacked but in light of the further revelations coming out about hacking into murdered kids phones even I would not cross that line in pursuit of a cheap gag. I would like to rant about the ongoing saga of getting  our car fixed but as its still in the garage getting fixed I am holding fire before telling that unfortunate tale to make sure I get my car back fixed. So the two years since I started blogging has seen me leave the council, the swine flu outbreak, my first and only trip to Ibiza, two charity moustaches, a general election, cultural reviews of Riga, Benllech, Wroclaw, Fuengirola  Newcastle and York, World Cup 2010, Two Glastonbury trips, numerous concerts and the odd play, and general musing on a number of topics and the odd rant. If somebody were to pile up the amount of beer, cider and wine consumed during these past two years I think I would be shocked and if they put a marks and spencers crisps mountain outside my house I reckon I could feed the whole street for some time. Its nice to be able to look back at the past in what is a sort of diary form and seeing what were big stories at the time look quite silly now (Keys and Gray) So on with another year and lets see what this one brings and no doubt some ups and downs along with the occasional hangover and hopefully give you the odd smile when you are reading this. This will be blog 246 and views so far reach 29,149 with a best day of 246 hits on 18/2011.

So I have been watching the Star Wars films with Elizabeth ( Half way through episode III ) and what joy it must be to not know (Spoiler alert !!!! ) that Anakin turns into Darth Vader and then turns good at the end to save the universe. Not sure how I am gonna explain top-notch special effects turning in 1970’s sci-fi scenery and effects when we get to the original films but I will cross that bridge when we get to it. So along with that we have been playing Lego Star Wars on the xbox 360 and tonight she had me in the loft getting the Star Wars figures down. Now she is under no illusion that the Star Wars figures are mine and always will be mine but being a nice daddy I am prepared to share them for a day but if she breaks an arm of Chewbakka then she is grounded for a week and will never receive a penny more pocket money until she is 16. Some of them figures have been mine since the early 1980’s. So it was only fair of me to join in and play Star Wars with her and I was taken back in time to a galaxy far far away. Whilst in the loft I dug out some footy medals/trophies I won as as kid as Elizabeth needs to take them into school. First up was my Aigburth Peoples Hall (APH) under 13’s Tim Fortescue cup winners trophy from the 1986/1987 season. The final was played on Dutch Farm which by some strange co-incidence I live just 50 metres away from now and can see from my back window. I was a sub that night and our goalie was having a very poor game and I came on as a sub goalie (despite being an attacker back in them days) We were one nil down and with the help of my giant kicks down the hill (I was the size of a man at the age of 12 !!! ) we turned it around and won 2-1. Still the only cup I have won in my not so distinguished football career.  On doing some research on Tim Fortescue (Tim Fortescue who the fuck is Tim Fortescue) I found out this from the great Wikipedia ,Trevor Victor Norman Fortescue, CBE (28 August 1916 – 29 September 2008) was a British politician, known as Tim Fortescue. He was the Conservative Member of Parliament (MP) for Liverpool Garston from 1966 to 1974. Fortescue was first elected to Parliament in the 1966 general election. He was re-elected to the 1970 general election and, having been appointed by Edward Heath as an assistant whip under Francis Pym, served as a senior whip, Lord Commissioner of the Treasury from 1971 until he resigned in September 1973. He retired from the Commons at the February 1974 general election, and Labour went on to win the seat. So the only bloody thing I ever won at footy and the pinnacle of my footy life was ironically named in honour of a fucking Tory MP for Liverpool. I feel like handing the trophy back now !!! The other priceless piece of Faymondo football memorabilia is an APH sportsman of the year award for 1988. I remember there was a bit of a stink about this as its normally awarded to the shite player who turns up every week and doesn’t get a game (no that wasnt me) but I think I won it for generally being a nark on the pitch !! So I leave you with a glorious scene from my sorry I mean Elizabeth’s Star Wars game tonight and the Empire on the march. Happy second birthday blog (was the 3rd July but I was too busy getting pissed at BBQ’s !! )

Peace

Fay x x x ( 3 kisses for year 3 of my blog)

I’m being stalked.

So now I know how Rio Ferdinand felt when he was being stalked by some crazy woman from Peckham. Other famous stalking cases from Catherine Zeta Jones through to the most famous and saddest Mark Chapman stalking the one and only John Lennon. So what have I done to deserve this ? It’s quite unnerving to be honest. What kind of stalker do I have. Have I rejected them and they are what is classed as a “rejection stalker” I don’t think I have rejected them or if I have I wont be telling you (as you will see when the name of my stalker is revealed) Other types of stalkers are resentful stalkers who pursue a vendetta because of a sense of grievance against the victims – motivated mainly by the desire to frighten and distress the victim. Jesus I am scaring myself now. Carrying on with this stalking lecture is my stalker an intimacy stalker who seeks to establish an intimate, loving relationship with their victim. To many of them the victim is a long-sought-after soul mate, and they were ‘meant’ to be together. Are they an incompetent suitor, despite poor social or courting skills, have a fixation, or in some cases a sense of entitlement to an intimate relationship with those who have attracted their amorous interest. Their victims are most often already in a dating relationship with someone else. I am in big trouble if its one of these. Last but not least is a predatory stalker who spy on the victim in order to prepare and plan an attack – often sexual – on the victim. Dont know if I can carry on now ! After a bit of investigation my earlier line of “What have I done to deserve this” ended up being a clue in my stalking case. It is of course a song by The Pet Shop Boys who I came out of the closet with and admitted a liking for their pop songs and have seen a few time live, best one being Glastonbury 2010. So being the social network and internet fiend that I am I of course “liked” them on Facebook (Might have lost a few of the granddad’s who read this shite now with a Facebook like) So it is indeed through the medium that is Facebook that my stalking is taking place. The stalker even posts a picture of himself (lets hope this is deffo not a a predatory stalker) every time he stalks me. The good news is that he also posts his name. So I can reveal my stalker to be none other than The Bronski Beating, Communard bashing, Glasgow’s famous son Jimmy Somerville.  Nearly every time I go on Facebook Jimmy’s little cherub face pops up inviting me to go and watch him. Now anybody who has seen the “Smalltown Boy” video (I will post it at the bottom of the blog) can’t fail to be scared by this. Now Jimbo has a belter voice and I know this video was out in a different era and addressing big issues but there’s some dodgy swimming pool scenes on the go there. Now I’m no homophobe and had many of my best clubbing nights in the gay bars and clubs of Liverpool back in the mid 90’s (Scallies wouldn’t go there for a start) but for the record I would much more prefer being stalked on Facebook by Julia Somerville than Jimmy Somerville and on research its seems Julia was stalked at one point as well. So here is little Jimmy’s grid stalking me.

So I might have to swerve Facebook for a bit until Jimmy fucks off or the restraining order I have applied for kicks in. Thinking about Julia Somerville made me think about all the other female news readers. From my earliest tingles to Angela Rippon and Selina Scott onto Anna Ford and more recently Sophie Raworth and them glasses on Kate Silverton !! Anyway check out this link TV Ark news page  to go down memory lane and blimp, sorry I mean reminisce about days gone past in the world of TV news. Here’s hoping Julia Somerville is on Facebook soon.

Smalltown Boy video below

Peace

Fay x x

***** Stalking is a very serious issue. Anybody else who is having stalking issues by Jimmy Somerville on Facebook or anybody else try http://www.stalkinghelpline.org/ ******