My 38th birthday and a rogue satellite

Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me. So a proud moment on Sunday and my 38th birthday. Not only did I have this to celebrate I also had reached a milestone I had been waiting for a long time. I am finally the same age as my waist size (fat bastard) With the increasing inevitability of my waist size never shrinking it was nice to draw level and I look forward to taking the lead next September. So sunday was spent with a few of the lads on a small pub crawl around Allerton Road and the surrounding areas taking in Penny Lane and finishing in the Rose OF Mossley. For a tactical stop we visited a quaint little chippy on Penny Lane just for a chip barm and was somewhat disappointed to find that it was just a few oven chips lashed in the fryer. After that tactical for the first time in my life I entered The Dovedale Towers. When I were a lad back in the early 90’s “the towers” was one of the places to be but I never went there. I can’t think why and no I wasnt being a nerd studying for my A levels. I was obviously to cool to hang out with all the cool kids !!! So after 11 drinks I headed home at the reasonable hour of 7.30. There was not a taxi in sight and I ended up walking home from The Rose of Mossley to by the matchworks with a stop off at a proper chippy near the end. This was despite needing a piss from very early on. From being a Twitter and Facebook stalker I knew I was walking past a girl I went to school with’s house. Jackie was most probably one of the cool kids who went to “the towers” Having only spoken to her through the medium of social networking I decided it was far too cheeky to turn up after 20 years pissed saying “Hi Jackie I spotted your house from the pics you posted on Facebook of your extension and was desperate for a piss so can I use your bog !! ” Option 2 was to sneak into Garston park for a slash as it was now dark. I was pretty desperate by now and again decided against that option as I just had visions of getting caught and or being accused of flashing !! I was a good boy and held it in until I got home but had to speed up near the end and must have looked like a drunken olympic walker the speed I was going !! A great day out wasnt to be ruined by the footy and I was asleep for 9.30 with no hangover for work.

So A dead spacecraft that is tumbling to Earth will re-enter the atmosphere on Friday evening or Saturday morning UK time, according to Nasa’s latest analysis. Most of the bus-sized Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite (UARS) will burn up in the atmosphere, but more than half a tonne of debris is predicted to get through. The falling spacecraft is expected to begin its final descent to Earth sometime between the hours of noon and midnight US Eastern time on Friday (between 5pm Friday and 5am Saturday British Summer Time), according to an update released by the US space agency on Wednesday. The spacecraft’s orbit puts a great swathe of the planet in its path between the latitudes of 57 degrees north and south. Mainland Britain lies between 50 and 60 degrees north. The satellite spends more time at higher latitudes, so there is a slightly higher risk in those regions. Now I don’t need much of an excuse to have a bevvy in the house but I might have to have one Friday night as it might land on me and I have denied myself a last bevvy. The odds of it hitting any human are 3200/1 so the odds on it being me are very high indeed and much more chance of winning the euro millions. But danger is danger and I have weighed up the risks and I think it is worth having a drink just in case oh and an idiot abroad two is on Sky always better accompanied by a small beverage.


Fay x x x

And remember it could be you !!


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