Happy birthday blog (3) the god particle is sussed.

So it was July 3rd 2009 when I published my first blog “My first blog (The future of banking)” HERE and oh how the bankers are still in the news. To think my blog was about how unhelpful my bank the HSBC are. Well nothings changed in the first few years of this blog the HSBC kindly knocked me back for a mortgage but said I was Ok to borrow the same amount of money via a loan over 10 years but then said oh by the way were banging another 2% interest on it. (Thank god for Tezzies loans) The Santander bank went one better and agreed the mortgage but because we had the main mortgage and had then tapped into equity a few times it was classed as 6 mortgages and their computer could only handle 4 on a re-mortgage !! Well we all know the banking system very well now. It is that the government gives banks money to lend which they then slot for themselves and have been on the fiddle making massive bonuses and we all pay. Thats not to mention various other things like getting us in the shit in the first place and never mind PPI and bank charge refunds. But lets not get hung up on the banks its a time for a birthday celebration as this here pile of waffle enters its fourth year. Thanks for putting up with me.

So this week Cern scientists reporting from the Large Hadron Collider (LHC) have claimed the discovery of a new particle consistent with the Higgs boson. This particle has been named by some the “god” particle. So does this mean that this was the particle that created everything and it wasn’t some fella with a long beard who then got a virgin “knocked up” who had a baby in late December. So god as I thought does not exist. All those lovely churches will be turned into trendy apartments and the local offy will now have a very large drop in sales of red wine and Disco crisps. I assume thats what  had when I went up drunk at midnight mass once and I have still got the bible I nicked as well that christmas eve back in the early 90’s. Forgive me father I have sinned. Well I have sinned a bit more since then but lets move on eh. So with god crushed by the discovery of the “god” particle I then read that they were only 99.999997% or something so there is still a little chance the big man is real along with his mate the tooth fairy. It was then I seen the light what if the “god” particle was actually god ! He was presenting himself to us how he started and once we found out more about him he would then suck everything in that he had created back into this particle and then disappear into nothing and that was that. He had decided that we had made a royal fuck up of things with war, famine and then bankers being the final straw. Now in our final summer he is sending biblical rains (well Ok 15.7mm today on my weather station), the euro and financial situation is in a mess. The end is nigh and as one last punishment to man he is going to let Andy Murray win Wimbledon. Dont believe my theory ? Tut tut well I am off to feed a whole lot of people with five fishes and loaves in my multicoloured dreamcoat and on the way I will part the sea and get in my ark. Come to think of it an ark might be a good shout this summer.


Fay x x x x

Oh and the blog gets its traditional birthday makeover with a new design, thanks for reading hope I raise a smile now and again.


Stone Roses resurrected.

So Sunday came around and with no Glasto this year the Stone Roses was the biggest event I was going to. I had managed to get on a mini bus there and back through the lad I was going with knowing a lad who had boxed a bus off. With the dodgy weather we have had and also the chance of rain it was deffo going to be a bit muddy so wellies were the order of the day. A tweet back from Peter Hooton of The Farm (Justice band) confirmed it was wellies weather and the only pair I had were my Glasto union jack wellies. Now I was uncertain as to put them on as I had no clue who I was going with but had arranged to meet in the Brookhouse boozer beforehand. I made the decision not to walk in the Brookhouse with my union jack wellies on. Imagine the look on peoples faces as I stroll in at 12pm in my union jack wellies for a casual sunday afternoon bevvy in a Liverpool pub ! So after two pints the mini bus had arrived and I planned to covertly put my wellies on during the trip to Manchester. Imagine the shock when two of the lads who were waiting for the bus has yes union jack wellies on. So from thinking I was going to look an oddball I was now in the middle of a fashion clash. Those of you that know me know that I aint worried about shit like that so I legged it over to tezzies to grab some cans for the minibus for the start of a long day of fun.

So we arrived at Heaton Park with plenty of time to spare and were one of the first in thus sorting out a wristband for “the pit” and a speck near the stage. The old booze was a bit pricey at £4 a pop so I drank a few quick ones so I didn’t have to have to do much queuing later on which was pretty bad by the main event. The day just wizzed past and my plan of seeing the Justice Band from the pit bypassed me. Twas a bit gutted about that on Monday but I had seen them the week before at arm’s length at The Picket. We made sure we had got our specks once The Wailers were on and suitable oiled up with a switch to cider it was time to get down to some dred reggae grooves. Plan B was next up before the main event with some cool choons. But it was the main event we were all after. It was then time for the Stone Roses to come on. Now I will admit that musically they passed me around first time in 1990. Age 16 I was still buying Technotronic twelve inch singles although I was mature enough not to be swept along by the teenage mutant hero turtles craze of that year. But having matured (yes matured see later) I recognised the choons made by The Stone Roses and was excited about seeing them live. Sure enough it was time for “I wanna be adored” All the corker tracks where being played. One of the lads who had accepted jaffa cakes off a stranger (stranger danger) soon had a girl on his shoulders and what six-foot 7 ish shoulders they are. The power of jaffa cakes eh ! As expected I was made up when “Fools Gold’ came on and the other track that I remember for some unknown reason was “Bye Bye Badman” With The Roses finishing off with the traditional very long and brilliant version of “I am the resurrection” the night had passed so quick and the Roses were off. They don’t do encores so we were left to a  bit of “Redemption Song” played through the speakers and a flurry of fireworks that put the gloss on the end of a magic evening.  So post concert it was a game of hunt the mini bus and we were all weary after a long day I was losing hope of finding the thing after being excited by every white minibus that went past (there were lots) but then as we came along a closed road a white minibus was indeed on the horizon and like a vision it was ours. We managed to pick up a stranger who wanted a lift to Warrington from us who specked our accents and knew we were Liverpool bound. This soon changed to being dropped off at The Trafford Centre and after fleecing him of this last eight quid he got his lift and our driver was eight pound up. he should count himself lucky we could have dropped him off in the middle of Speke. I met a cracking gang on that Sunday Andy, Karen, Sean, Lewis and Eoin and was even invited back to Andy’s for post gig shenanigans but with work on Monday and our new house to decorate this week I made the very mature decision to bail out at The Matchworks and was indeed in bed for just on 01:30am. (told you I was mature) We never did get to see what was really sold in the Columbians finest outlet at the gig.

What a day and what a gig. Just look at how excited I was !


Fay x x x x

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