So after feeling pretty refreshed after resisting the temptation of after hours on Saturday it was time to get the bad bit of the day out of the way. There had been some rain overnight but nothing too bad and it was the 60 min plus walk to the car and back to take a load of gear back and then we could enjoy the day. On the way though I had my first action tumble in 5 years of Glastonbury as my right foot slipped forward and I leant back to balance forgetting I had a full backpack on and over I went. Not only that in trying to get up I had even more comedy stumbles before finally being helped up. I would have laughed it if was not me falling over ha ha. Considering some of the states I have been in at Glastonbury one fall in five years will do me meaning my next fall there will be in the next decade !! Having got back from the bad bit of the day there was only one option to do and have a pre lunch Desperados to kick the final day of the festival.
So we ambled around to the Pyramid stage to watch Hozier who weren’t too bad. I then decided to stretch my legs now fully armed at last with some wellies and not Adidas trainers after my last pair of wellies were surgically removed from my legs at 3am on Saturday morning. Taking in some of the cabaret and circus fields we had a chilled pint at West Holts before heading back to the main stage for Lionel. It was pretty busy for Lionel and he had the crowd in his hands from song one mixing up hits from his solo career and time with the Commodores. As if by magic the sun appeared whilst he was singing “Easy” Next up was the finish and “Hello” Now I remember buying this back in 1984 from Woolworths in Rhyl. It was a present for my sister from my school trip to Colomendy. My sisters three kids Adam (28) and twins James & Lily (16) were next to me as I recalled buying this single for their mum. Fancy the poor souls having to go to their first Glastonbury with “Uncle Knobhead” ha ha. It was here I had a moment and flashback to that time as we all lived in the same house with my mum and dad in Mossley Hill Road. Funny enough at this same time some bastard by me must have been eating a hot dog with loads of onions as though not actually confirmed or verified I might of had a tear in my eye. Glastonbury had got me and if a giant clay head would have appeared above the stage I think I would have been a mess !! Not for long though as “All night long” come on to raise the dancing levels in the field and rounded off with what seemed a strange time to sing the American band aid song “We are the world” Uncle knobhead was of course singing along to the songs chorus when he looked at his oldest nephew who blankly looked at me and said “I had never heard this song in my entire life” and a quick bit of maths revealed Adam would have been minus one and a half years when it was released. Take that Uncle Knobhead yer old man.
Next we headed en mass up to the acoustic tent to scouse it up for The Bootleg Beatles but sadly due to some reason it was a shorted set than expected but we all had a mighty fine singalong. Same tent and next up was the acoustic blues singer songwriter Eric Bibb. With his guitar and two man band he brought a mellow sunday afternoon vibe to the tent just a damn shame the Bootleg Beatles had three times as many people watching him but there were many outside the tent enjoying the sounds of Eric Bibb. I missed him in 2011 as I was stuck across the other side of Glastonbury and conditions under foot were bad. Glad I caught him this year with his sweet voice that could easily dip into soul music if he wished and his more laid back blues was brilliant.
Time to head back the tent and put on my make up for the last night and don my fluorescent orange bib and KLF top hat complete with flashing police light to head out for The Chemical Brothers. We got a decent speck nearish the front left of the stage with some space to dance. The rest of the Chemical Brothers set is just a joyous blur of the madness of the start of the set and then a lull into being hypnotised by the graphics on and around the stage which included two giant robots coming from the back of the stage moving forward which took me a whilst to work out. Once your mind had been messed with (and how all the young space cadets would have been feeling that) it was time for the finale and one massive upbeat finish. What a perfect way to round of Glastonbury 2015. I had little energy left. The easy formula of too many beers and cider in plus minimal food over five days (Less in, less out) and miles of walking and being on the floor of a tent enclosed in a coffin of a sleeping back equals a very tired me after 5 days. A traditional tray of chips on the way back the tent as we trudged through the dance village full of space cadets just beginning their journey after The Chemical Brothers it was time for this bearded old man to hit the sleeping bag. No chance of Electric Swing circus at midnight then onto Craig Charles at 1am and up to the stone circle for sunrise. Pre Chemical Brothers that is what I was pondering below. But the chips won !
Many thanks to what ended up a large cast of people who we met at different points over the five days and a special mention for Helen Carter who without her help we could have had either a lot less stuff with us or a massive almost impossible struggle from the coach. Glastonbury you have had me and spat me out the other end. As always it’s been a privilege.
Hope this works a small clip of the Chemical Brothers I tweeted posted on Instagram (Yes I am a social media whore)just click on the Instagram link
I will post my best pics and have a round up of highlights and indeed bits I had forgotten for my next blog. I promise then no more mention of Glastonbury, well until the great ticket hunt starts in October 2015.
Fay x x x x x x
So it was safe to say that after the pace of Friday the Saturday is the calm before the last push. We ended up leaving base camp that late that breakfast was skipped and replaced by a sausage roll later on. With the sun back out conditions under feet were much better and it was back to putting on my Adidas Trabs. We slowly ambled around the site having a few cans before finding a nice pub and a seat outside in the shade with The Waterboys playing in the distance and I shared a few ciders with my 16 year old nephew. We then popped around to the John Peel tent to see The Sleaford Mods but sadly Alan has his own time zone and we missed them ! We took the chance to chill and recharge with one of the lads having a snooze to catch up on coming in at 6:30am as he couldn’t find the tent instead deciding to crash under somebody’s gazebo.
We headed back to base camp to put on that evenings make up and to pick up my top hat !! It was then up to West Holts armed with numerous cans to watch Todd Terje and his band perform and the dancing shoes were on again and away we go on another Glastonbury journey. A compete change of mood next and Dr John Cooper Clarke though after a dance though to a sit down poetry session it was too much after a bit and I popped around for a bit of The Mothership returns and some funk and a boogie.
We got a good speck for the last planned set of the night and Public Service Broadcasting. They did not disappoint and their samples and visualls struck the right chord and away I went for over an hour with the track “The Other Side” particularly an emotional moment as they reappear from the dark side of the moon with the whole tent in one cheering.
So there was a rumoured secret set by Django Django but I could not face the hike up the hill to the crows nest and headed to bed via the shop for my traditional salt and vinegar crisps and a Twix ! With it raining again this morning I decided for a compost poo and their traps have a roof on. Bad enough slumming it for a shit never mind getting rained on and not knowing if your wiping away rain or piss from the toilet seat
So the final effort. I will post Sunday’s tales on Monday night. Come on Glastonbury bring on some Sunday Chemicals. That’s the Chemical Brothers before you ask !!!!
Fay x x x x x x
Friday a tale of trough to peak via some rain. So the decision to have a mellow Thursday paid dividends and I was feeling fine. After grabbing some fuel in the form of yes you guessed it a sausage barm. Mrs Fay finally arrived on site around 11am and out we went. First up Hobo Jones and the Junkyard Dogs who had the large Avalon crowd going. Next up meeting everybody for some Alabama Shakes who I had never any stuff before. The biggest compliment I can pay is that she reminded me of a female Solomon Burke. Then the rain did cometh and my wellies were in the car off site. Not too wet we headed up to see Liverpool band Stealing Sheep a female trio with hints of 1980’s and lots of synths about them. We were just about to head home when the weatherman in me spotted rain in the distance. A quick check of the radar (yes I am a nerd) and we scurried back into the tent before everyone else did and were stuck on there for 30 minsplus as it pissed down. Due to this rain stop play delay we never got around to seeing Wilko Johnson again as it was time to head back the tent to put my makeup and top hat on !!
Have to say at this point with wet feet and feeling tired it was a bit of a Glastonbury trough. I managed to get a pair of wellies I thought didn’t fit me but somehow magically did now ? Off to see Django Diango who were amazing amazing and with the blue police light on the top of my top hat proudly flashing away it was a Glastonbury peak. The top hat gained respect but sadly one girl asked who are KLF and we worked out she was 1 year old when they had thier hits. Sad old man in a KLF top hat. Fortunately an older girl came up to me later on and we had a good talk about The KLF.
The headline of the night for me were Lamb. I had heard a few old tracks from Cafe Del Mar albums and listened to their new album on Spotify. I had a feeling they could be a surprise act and boy they did not let me down. Almost angelic singing from the female lead singer had me in a trance for the entire set.
A hike up to our fave less well known spot the crows nest where King Gizzard were playing and I stood outside marvelling at the view over the campsite. It was time to head down to Arcadia for a dance and some flame throwing from the giant spider and a stagger and sway home to the tent. It was here I then discovered the wellies that didn’t fit me but did now didn’t and in our state couldn’t get them off. Only one thing to do and my mate performed surgery on them and finally they were off but not sure they will be used again. RIP wellies. Time of death 3:17am. So sweated out the tent at 8am today is gonna be a test of stamina. The bogs are starting to smell and mixed in with a hangover I was quickly out of there after dropping the kids off in poo bay.
Fay x x x x x x
Forgot to mention that on Wednesday night we were walking up a path when the one and only Michael Eavis and his missus drove past us in a land rover. First spot in 5 years of coming here and the first night for my 16 year old niece and nephew jammy bastards.
Also last nights randomly placed red phone boxes are placed around the dance village and you can dial to speak to one. As you might guess this can be amusing at 1am talking pissed nonsense to a stranger who is in the Glastonbury mood as well.
It must be said we were feeling a bit delicate on Thursday morning but after finding a new (but not as good) breakfast stop we headed up to Williams Green for 11am to see Wilko Johnson play. My god was that tent he played in hot. Iust standing there the sweat was dripping of me and cocktails and Desperados oozing out of my pores. It was only a short set and what a blisteringly hot set it was as well. The bass player who used to be in the Blockheads was one of the best bass players I have had the honour to see. We then picked the rest of our gear up that had come down by car and my Glastonbury hat arrived in once piece and will make its debut tonight. More of that in tomorrow’s blog I’m sure. The rest of the day was spent lazily by the tent consuming more Desperados before we headed out at 6pm.
It was straight to Shangri-la to watch “Beans on toast” who is a modern day version of Billy Bragg but with a more cruder edge. It was packed and he was taken aback by the size of his crowd and it was a good set with som amusing and cutting lyrics. Back up to the Glastonbury hill to see the sunset again and take some pictures with my good camera. We decided to head home at 10:30 and save ourselves for the festival start on Friday. In bed with a Twix for supper again for 11:30 the earliest I have been to bed ever but I feel great this morning and there was more than enough madness on Wednesday night to keep me going !!
Earlier on in the day we hoisted our traditional “Tyskie” flag up and it’s flying proudly over our camp site. Went for a compost poo this morning and it was a pretty pleasant experience so all good in the poop department.
Fay x x x x x x
So we ended up on the party coach on the way down with a loud mouthed Scouse bird but we ploughed on listening to some very dodgy electronic dance music through the worlds worst speaker system. After arriving the worst bit of the whole Glastonbury experience and lugging all the gear including a lot of booze to our camp speck on Bushy Fields. All set up and ready to go we headed out to take four Glastonbury virgins on a tour of the site which included my 16 year old niece and nephew. They were amazed at the size of the site and were blown away as we climbed up the hill for a great view of the whole site and we were treated to a fine sunset.
Sadly our traditional sausage butty shop has moved and the amazingly designed toilets at The Crows Nest have gone as well. It was whilst up the hill the mathematical question of “How many sides does a Stegasurus have” was raised. Expecting a numerical answer Alan’s replies included “caring” and “emotional” on the way down the hill we found a random boogie point and the DJ dropped “where love lives” by Alison Limerick which hit the spot.
The rest of the night hours into random meandering and dodgy cocktails but I had the cunning plan of having a small notebook and pen to make notes for the blog. Just one small problem the last note I made is impossible to read !!
Felt a bit rough this morning on the traditional hike to the bogs for my daily number two. The bogs are in decent condition at the moment but I couldn’t resist looking down into the long drop to see where my log had dropped. Wish I hadn’t now.
Oh well day two more ale and a more mellow night tonight before the start of the festival on Friday. Glastonbury it’s great to be back and I still love you more than ever.
Fay x x x x x x
So the big day had a arrived and the real reason behind the epic beard growth was not Glastonbury but I had a trial for WWE wrestling and the beard was all part of the act. Sadly I did not pass the test failing to execute a perfect suplex and also unable to touch my toes ! The best I could come up with was my all in one union jack leotard with protruding belly and a chant of “Easy, Easy” but the interview board were not impressed and has seen it somewhere before ? So I might as well keep it for Glastonbury and head up to the craft and healing fields one day to put some beads in it and then shave it off on my return. I had been practising my wrestling poses very hard as shown in the picture below on the way back from Africa Oye. Speaking of which me and Charlotte popped down to Sefton Park on The Saturday tea time as the sun was out. We did walk up with the dog Benny The Morkie but he just sat down at the very edge and refused to move any more. Fancy having a dog that doesn’t like festivals !! On our return me and Charlotte went on the fair, listened to some music and grabbed a sausage and chips, oh and a cider for myself. We won an inflatable ball on the hook a duck and Charlotte wanted to play with it so we had a kick around on the outskirts of the festival. It was at this point the beach ball sized inflatable ball and me fell out. I say fell out I done a comedy stumble right over on my arse (Thankfully no daft injury pre-Glastonbury) but it was right in front of two lovestruck teenage couples who were doing their best not to laugh. I just looked at them and said don’t mind me I am just gonna sit here a bit to not make myself look like a complete knobhead to which they laughed. Laughing at the old falling over eh, the youth of today, shower of bastards. We headed on down on Sunday with the family for fathers day and has a great day down there with a picnic and a few beers. It’s a cracking free festival and well worth a visit next year.
So here were are
christmas eve Glastonbury Eve and I am all packed with just the cool bag stuffed with tins of Desperados to sort out in the morning. Just remembered I hadn’t packed a bog roll (That could of got interesting) As ever I will be posting a blog daily from Worthy Farm complete with traditional toilet updates. So get ready for a week go nothing but Glastonbury stories. I leave at 10am on the coach this time. My handcrafted top hat is already on site brought down kindly by somebody who is working there. Hope to be on site myself about 4pm. Quick tent set up and then out on the pop for a mad first night. Looks like we will see some rain but no mud bath. The traditional Tyskie flag has been taken down from my boys room/office and will flying proudly over our tents by tomorrow evening. My niece and nephew age 16 are going for the first time. Oh how they are gonna see a different side of uncle knobhead ha ha. Well thats that having a beer to get me in the mood and listening to the chemical brothers. Next blog Thursday morning and I leave you with a pic of the sun setting on last years Sunday before Massive Attack played. I love Glastonbury and can’t wait to get there, sorry kids (And wife for 2 days)
Fay x x x x x x
So Saturday afternoon and a trip to M&S food to stock up on some post half marathon munchies for after Sunday’s race, more of that later. On entering the store I could see a ray of light to the far left. Thats strange I thought but even stranger was that it was pulling me towards it like something was meant to happen. In a trance like state I made it to the refrigerator and there it was staring me right in the face, limited edition sausage rolls. Not no ordinary sausage rolls but limited edition black pudding and pork sausage rolls. Made in Yorkshire with crisps all butter puff pasty, black pudding and pork shoulder topped with oats and black onion seeds. For those of you who don’t know me I am a very fussy eater. For those of you who do know me and my love of sausage rolls you will know that trying these is a bit “out there” for me. First up I haven’t a clue what black onion seeds are ! Can you get white onion seeds ? Do they actually have anything to do with onions ? I do like cheese and onion crisps thats about it oh and pickled onion monster munch. But lets not let a few random seeds get in the way of sausage roll utopia. Anyway always good to have a few seeds to see how long they take to come out of the other end. Anyway the review is as follows. The delicious crumbly buttery taste was soon replaced by the soft texture of the pork and an after hint of black pudding. In other words they were fucking tasty. Gonna have to grab some more as I would love to come home after 10 pints and demolish a pack of these the taste then would be of orgasmic proportions. I can only sum up with the highest honour for these sausage rolls in declaring that no Sir Thomas of Ketchup was needed. Why spoil the taste of what was nearly the perfect sausage roll. I can’t say perfect because then the hunt would be over. As you might guess these are scoffed for tea on Saturday and made it nowhere near the post half marathon munchies.
So going back to Monday and it was like chrimbo day in the Fay household. Well for me anyway and the long awaited delivery of my Apple Watch. Now when the watch was announced I couldn’t quite see the point of one. After trying one on and being seduced by an Apple salesman in Cambridge back in April it had me and I ordered one with a wait until the end of June. Thankfully this moved forward and on Monday the watch came. Let me say now there is no valid point to an Apple watch. Why did you get one then ? Well I am a well known Apple slag and also a gadget freak after being scarred for life when my mum and dad only bought me a 16k ZX Spectrum whilst a few of my mates had the all singing and all dancing 48k version. I think from that christmas day I must have vowed never to be left behind in the race or technology ever again and Apple won me over when I bought a second generation iPod. So the watch is basically an extension of your phone. So for the quick things you can now be a lazy bastard and now not have to get your phone out of your pocket or reach over to a table you have put it on. It is however the science fiction of when I was a child talking into something on your wrist to communicate even if I did feel a bit strange talking to my hand in Sports Direct to see what my eldest needed for a visit to PGL ! It has a nifty fitness app on and with the help of Siri you can tweet and reply to texts all from your wrist. The maps feature is handy to place at on a wrist even if that could be dodgy when driving but never fear the watch can tap you once or twice to tell you to turn left or right !! Many of the apps on your phone appear on the watch. Breaking news on your wrist !! So with buying this watch it effectively makes my Tissot and my late dads Gucci watch redundant ? Will I become so reliable on the Apple watch that I can’t bring myself to take it off and put a dress watch on, not that I dress up much, well only when Mrs Fay tells me to bang my fireman outfit on and then put the BBQ out after quickly realising it wasn’t quite the fireman she was expecting ! So the Apple watch is a techno geeks idea of a black pudding and pork sausage roll. To many people it will be why when you can go to Sayers ?
And finally today was the Liverpool Rock’n’Roll half marathon. This was my 4th half marathon. I decided in early April I didn’t have the heart to try a full one this time around and indeed had not done as many long runs as previous half marathon training. Anyway after arriving like a world class athlete on the 82 bus it was a quick change in the Echo Arena and then to the start line. I started off at whatever pace happened and as can happen I started off very fast. Soon to slow down with some hills around the three mile stage. All seemed ok with peaks and troughs as many
world class 17 stone athletes go through and then the turn onto the prom for the last 5 miles (ish) and a slight wind into your face ughhhhhh. That prom stretch is soul destroying. Very few people cheering you on when you need it most, boring with nothing of note to look at and almost always into a fucking headwind. I swear I am not doing anymore Liverpool races along there. My fitness regime is going on tour from now on. With the boost of people along the front by the arena I raised myself to sprint home and got a time of 2:01:36 which was 3 mins outside my PB from March though I put that down to a headwind and also the drag of my now rather long beard !! Not one but two medals to add to the collection as I got an “encore” medal as I done the full marathon last year. Time for a pint after the race to watch some of the gig and a quick bevy in town it’s always a good feeling when you complete a race. I have entered the London Marathon ballot so fingers crossed. But for now its jarg Aldi cider and the rest of my M&S munchies bought on Saturday. Oh how I wish I had saved those black pudding beauties for now.
Fay x x x x x x