The 2017 Faymondo Music Awards (Say no to The Brits)


So back when I was first getting into music and thought the Brit Awards were cool, well they were to a 14 year old me. I decided to note down my own awards inside a maths exercise book I had robbed from school. Those small squares on the page kept my writing just that little bit tidier. With that act the Faymondo Music Awards were conceived. They were never going to be cool as a 14 year old picking his fave albums and artists from the limited amount of albums bought with pocket money and prezzies for birthday and chrimbo. Growing up the winners would be no cooler. But here we are this year celebrating the 30th year of the Faymondo Music Awards. 30 years on I couldn’t give a toss if my winners aren’t cool. Just my opinion on the big world of music out there. How much has changed over the 30 years in the “music biz” since the start of the awards but for me musically I am buying more music than I ever have due to my vinyl addiction and listening to a whole lot more variety thanks to the world of Spotify.

So being the 30th anniversary I had big plans for a celebration of my fave music of the last 30 years. My event had to be held on the same night as the Brits but have no worries of artists not being there to pick up an award and instead a pre-recorded face time message because Ed Sheeran wont be getting a look in. He’s not even best ginger artists of 2017 that award goes to local talent Ali Ingle. So with the mini sausage rolls ordered from Iceland and unlimited amounts of Skol on offer (I have a budget you know but Desperados in the VIP section) I had even pushed the boat out and bought a job lot of party poppers and silly string and the icing on the cake some gold envelopes. Sadly the invitations never went out as I recoiled in horror as my venue of The Aigburth Peoples Hall was busy on Wednesday 21st February 2018 as their darts B-Team had a home match against Mossley Hill Legion B-Team. So instead winners are to be announced below as I type this and can hear the real Brit Awards from the front room watched by my daughters. We could only imagine what my awards might have been like (Insert images going wavy and the non reality of what the night would have been like)

First up best newcomer and to present the best newcomer award is Geoffrey Hayes from rainbow. So having solo albums out previously and teaming up to perform live and now getting better known for the legendary “house gigs” (Must sort my own out) the winner of best newcomer 2017 is Henry Priestman & Les Glover who released “Six of one & half a dozen of the other”

Next up best female and another icon from my past to present the trophy. Ladies and Gentlemen Mr Jan Molby and the winner for the record 9th time Sheryl Crow and a track from her 2017 album “Be Myself”.

Just an update sausage rolls half gone but still loads of Skol left ?? Next up and best male. Here to present the award all the way from Australia is Val Lehman AKA Bea Smith from Prisoner Cell Block H. And the winner is Nasher aka Brian Nash and his album 432-1 : Open the vein

So just two awards to go and these must be the big ones as there is a runner up section ?? Here to present firstly runner up in best group 2017 is the cast from Auf Wiedersehen Pet. First up and runner up with their “Every Valley” album Public Service Broadcasting.

And so onto the winner and a fine return to form with ‘Automaton” best group 2017 is Jamiroquai

*** Note at this point a pissed up Jay Kay (I knew free Skol was a bad idea) has a pop at the Auf Pet boys and Jimmy Nail twats him !!!

**** Second note if there was a remix of the year the Purple Disco Machine remix of “Cloud 9” is great.

So it’s the big one and the 30th Faymondo Music Awards best album of 2017. If you could put any paper plates in the bin bag coming around that would be great and also for some reason there is still loads of Skol left ??

Here to present the award is a member of a band I only got into very very late but am a proud owner of their vinyl box set of 5 studio albums its Mick Jones from The Clash.

Runner up was “Automaton” by Jamiroquai. Sadly Jay Kay cant be here as he is currently in Garston Walk in Centre and was kindly escorted there by Dennis from The Auf Pet Boys.

And so the winner of the 30th Faymondo Music Awards album of the year (Party poppers and silly string ready) and an album I have hammered but like all music I love I can now pin point an exact place and time. I was coming home from a Deacon Blue gig in Edinburgh in July feeling a lot worse for wear after a double night out for my wedding anniversary. How could I numb the pain of the journey home on the train as after an hour I was starting to sweat ale out. I put this album on and spent the next hour soaking up the lyrics looking out at Englands green and pleasant land. The album had me at the first track “Salt In Our Veins” through to the bashing of Gideon Osborne in “Prostitues and Cocaine” the brilliant takedown of Katie’s Price and Hopkins in “Katies” and finally the retro fest of “Just Sounds Like Noise” the winner is Nasher with “432-1 : Open the vein”

Well thats it folks. I am off to what could only be described as possibly the best pint ever with Nasher and Mick Jones and it would be rude not to invite Messrs Priestman and Glover along as well. Might as well go the old Aigburth Arms and Steves chippy on the way home. Just hope they dont laugh too much at the previous 30 years winners !!! Heres to another 30 years and to the grand old age of 74 !!

Peace

Fay x x x x x x x x x

For the record the shortlist

Little Fictions Elbow
Automaton Jamiroquai
Live At The Glasgow Barrowlands Deacon Blue
Backlash Black Joe Lewis & The Honeybears
Be Myself Sheryl Crow
Life Love Flesh Blood Imelda May
Every Valley Public Service Broadcasting
Six of one & Half a dozen of the other Henry Priestman & Les Glover
Short Stories Vol 1 Ricky Ross
Sings & Strings The Christians
432-1 : Open The Vein Nasher
Who Built The Moon Noel Gallagher & High Flying Birds
The Massive Gong The Destroyers
Crooked Calypso Paul Heaton & Jacqui Abbott
Migration Blues Eric Bibb
As You Were Liam Gallagher

And to laugh at the all time winners list.

BEST ALBUM WINNER

BEST ALBUM RUNNER UP

1988

Raintown-DEACON BLUE

The christians-THE CHRISTIANS

1989

When the world knows your name-DEACON BLUE

Checkmate-ROGER CHRISTIAN

1990

Colour-THE CHRISTIANS

In the blood-LONDONBEAT

1991

Fellow hoodlems-DEACON BLUE

Seal-SEAL

1992

Happy in hell-THE CHRISTIANS

Volume 3 just right-SOUL II SOUL

1993

Whatever you say,say nothing-DEACON BLUE

Happy in hell-THE CHRISTIANS

1994

Our town-DEACON BLUE

Very-PET SHOP BOYS

1995

Tuesday night music club-SHERYL CROW

Seal (2) – SEAL

1996

Sheryl crow-SHERYL CROW

Whats the story morning glory-OASIS

1997

Time for change-SOUL II SOUL

Your cool mystery-GARRY CHRISTIAN

1998

The globe sessions-SHERYL CROW

5-LENNY KRAVITZ

1999

On how life is-MACY GRAY

Beacoup fish-UNDERWORLD

2000

Sunset over london-JOOLS HOLLAND R/B’S ORCHESTRA

The marshall mathers lp-EMINEM

2001

Homesick- DEACON BLUE

Loco-FUN LOVIN’ CRIMINALS

2002

The Eminem Show-EMINEM

Roland Gift-ROLAND GIFT

2003

Don’t give up on me-SOLOMON BURKE

Prodigal Sons-THE CHRISTIANS

2004

How does it feel-GARRY CHRISTIAN

Feels like Home-NORAH JONES

2005

Wildflower-SHERYL CROW

Make do with what you got-SOLOMON BURKE

2006

Fundamental-PET SHOP BOYS

Nashville-SOLOMON BURKE

2007

Dog House Music-SEASICK STEVE

Overtones-JUST JACK

2008

Chronicles Of A Modern Life-HENRY PRIESTMAN

I Started Out With Nothing And Still Got Most Of It Left-SEASICK STEVE

2009

Yes – PET SHOP BOYS

All Night Cinema – JUST JACK

2010

Bittersweet Batch- JESSE DEE

Tell Em What Your Name Is- BLACK JOE LEWIS AND THE HONEYBEARS

2011

Build A Rocket Boys-ELBOW

London Afrobeat Collective – LAC

2012

Ill Manors -PLAN B

The Lumineers -THE LUMINEERS

2013

Electric – Pet Shop Boys

Random Access Memories –Daft Punk

2014

Tea Street Band – TEA STREET BAND

The Last Mad Surge Of Youth – HENRY PRIESTMAN

2015

Darling Arithmetic – VILLAGERS

Favourite Worry – THE MILK

2016

Summer 08 – METRONOMY

Cleopatra – THE LUMINEERS

2017

432-1 : Open The Vein – NASHER

Automaton – JAMIROQUAI

BEST GROUP WINNER

BEST GROUP RUNNER UP

1988

THE CHRISTIANS

DEACON BLUE

1989

FINE YOUNG CANNIBALS

DEACON BLUE

1990

THE CHRISTIANS

LONDONBEAT

1991

BLACK

DEACON BLUE

1992

SOUL II SOUL

EN VOGUE

1993

THE CHRISTIANS

DEACON BLUE

1994

DEACON BLUE

PET SHOP BOYS

1995

SOUL II SOUL

M PEOPLE

1996

OASIS

PET SHOP BOYS

1997

SOUL II SOUL

JAMIROQUAI

1998

FUN LOVIN CRIMINALS

OASIS

1999

JAMIROQUAI

UNDERWORLD

2000

JOOLS HOLLAND & RHYTHM/BLUES ORCHESTRA

THE CHRISTIANS

2001

DEACON BLUE

DAFT PUNK

2002

OASIS

UNDERWORLD

2003

THE CHRISTIANS

FUN LOVIN CRIMINALS

2004

JOOLS HOLLAND & RHYTHM/BLUES ORCHESTRA

THE PRODIGY

2005

JAMIROQUAI

FUN LOVIN CRIMINALS

2006

PET SHOP BOYS

TRANSIT KINGS

2007

PINK MARTINI

THE CHEMICAL BROTHERS

2008

OASIS

JEGSY DODD AND THE ORIGINAL SINNERS

2009

PET SHOP BOYS

MCINTOSH ROSS

2010

MASSIVE ATTACK

FAITHLESS

2011

ELBOW

LONDON AFROBEAT COLLECTIVE   

2012

DEACON BLUE

DJANGO DJANGO

2013

DAFT PUNK

PET SHOP BOYS

2014

TEA STREET BAND

METRONOMY

2015

VILLAGERS

PUBLIC SERVICE BROADCASTING

2016

METRONOMY

PET SHOP BOYS

2017

JAMIROQUAI

PUBLIC SERVICE BROADCASTING

BEST MALE

BEST FEMALE

1988

MICHEAL JACKSON

YAZZ

1989

ROGER CHRISTIAN

MADONNA

1990

ROGER CHRISTIAN

N/A

1991

SEAL

MADONNA

1992

MICHEAL JACKSON

MADONNA

1993

TERENCE TRENT D’ARBY

MADONNA

1994

TERENCE TRENT D’ARBY

N/A

1995

SEAL

SHERYL CROW

1996

RICKY ROSS

SHERYL CROW

1997

GARRY CHRISTIAN

SHERYL CROW

1998

LENNY KRAVITZ

SHERYL CROW

1999

JOSE PADILLA

MACY GRAY

2000

EMINEM

MADONNA

2001

N/A

MACY GRAY

2002

EMINEM

SHERYL CROW

2003

SOLOMON BURKE

NORAH JONES

2004

GARRY CHRISTIAN

NORAH JONES

2005

SOLOMON BURKE

SHERYL CROW

2006

SOLOMON BURKE

N/A

2007

SEASICK STEVE

NORAH JONES

2008

HENRY PRIESTMAN

SHERYL CROW

2009

JUST JACK

IMELDA MAY

2010

SOLOMON BURKE

SHERYL CROW

2011

NOEL GALLAGHER & HIGH FLYING BIRDS

BEVERLEY KNIGHT

2012

BILL FAY

NORAH JONES

2013

CHARLES BRADLEY

N/A

2014

HENRY PRIESTMAN

IMELDA MAY

2015

NOEL GALLAGHER & HIGH FLYING BIRDS

ROSIN MURPHY

2016

DAVID BOWIE

NORAH JONES

2017

NASHER

SHERYL CROW

BEST NEWCOMER TO ME

1988

DEACON BLUE

1989

SOUL II SOUL

1990

LONDONBEAT

1991

THE FARM

1992

EN VOUGE

1993

STEREO MC’S

1994

THE GRID

1995

SHERYL CROW

1996

RICKY ROSS

1997

FINLAY QUAYE

1998

KAREN RAMIREZ

1999

JOSE PADILLA

2000

EMINEM

2001

XXXXXXXXXXXXX

2002

ROLAND GIFT

2003

SOLOMON BURKE (NEW TO ME)

2004

DR JOHN (NEW TO ME)

2005

JOHN LEGEND

2006

JEGSY DODD

2007

SEASICK STEVE

2008

ROISIN MURPHY

2009

IMELDA MAY

2010

JESSE DEE

2011

LONDON AFROBEAT COLLECTIVE

2012

THE DESTROYERS

2013

VILLAGERS

2014

TEA STREET BAND

2015

THE MILK

2016

SMOOTH & TURRELL

2017

HENRY PRIESTMAN & LES GLOVER

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: