Just say no kids (And original Ronaldo)

So walking the dogs up Sudley Field the other evening and there were some kids spinning around inhaling a substance out of a balloon. The effects must of lasted about 15 seconds and to be honest I reckon they would have has a better laugh if they just inhaled a bit and spoke to each other in high pitched voice like everybody does with the balloons tied to bag of sand disguised in a pretty box that are on tables at the end of a wedding when bladdered. It is such a shame how society is breaking down and the youth of 2018 are resorting to such shennanagins for entertainment. When I were a lad back in 1990 I would have been up Sudley Field with my posse after security at the IM Marsh security over the road couldn’t take any more of our antics. We wouldn’t have resorted to such things as balloons. No we were far too pre occupied with getting slaughtered on a litre bottle of Stock Bianco (A poor mans Cinzano Bianco) and singing along to Deacon Blue songs (Maybe thats what tipped the IM Marsh security boys over the edge) and then having a bop to “Ride On Time’ by Black Box. Using our creative juices literally to use a few 10p carton drinks as mixer and doubling up as a glass to neck our Stock Bianco out of. What must the dogs walkers of the 1990’s thought of our antics ? Saying “When I were a lad we used to just go the local milk bar for a jive” Now I am the dog walker. Next time I am gonna go up to them and say “Giz a go otherwise I will tell yer auld fella” but only do a small bit of the ballon and in a voice similar to Joe Pasquale say “This is shit here’s a litre of Stock Bianco” do a high pitched giggle and walk down the hill back to ours shouting back “Search for Pump Up The Jam by Technotronic on Spotify on your phone kidda’s”

In other drug related news is seems that original Ronaldo has been hospitalised in Ibiza with Flu. Yeah we have all been there Ronny. The old Ibiza “Flu” Ronaldo assured fans on social media on Sunday that he was fine and would soon be ready to go home after suffering “a heavy bout of flu” I wonder what club he went to on the Saturday night ? Or was he hardcore and been out since Friday ? Guess we will never know as what goes on in Ibiza stays in Ibiza. Get well soon Ronny and enjoy your Lemsip just don’t try and snort it ! Funny enough it comes exactly a year ago since I came out of retirement and went to Ibiza Read about it here

As the football season is back after football never came home and another little bit of me died on Sunday despite a Liverpool win and going top of the league. I liked the old days when the first table was produced after about 3 games. Also there is no need to be putting lines on for qualification and relegation again in the old days when these popped on on the graphics you knew it was the business end of the season. Anyway I spotted on the digital advertising around the ground Petro-Canada Lubricants “Liverpool’s official lubricant partner” Jesus I know football fans are getting screwed over all the time but do they need official lubricants now to ease the pain of being fisted for cash from their team. Again I preferred the old days of a Davy Liver taxi advertising in the corner. In fact I think I just prefer the old days. Speaking of which I am off to crack open the litre bottle of Stock Bianco I have bought. If you live in the Aigburth Vale area of Liverpool listen out for a merry man singing Deacon Blue songs echoing around the enogs of Aigburth “Can this white man sing the blooooooooooooos”


Fay x x x x x x x x x x


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