Fitness, Fatness and Divorce


So last weekend my social feeds were full of people doing The Manchester Marathon. A year ago I was taking part in what was an attempt at three marathons with London and Liverpool afterwards. I smashed Manchester in 4hrs 27 got around London in record heat for the event and had to just do the half in Liverpool due to illness the week before. I was the lightest I have been for years and in tip top condition. Fast forward one year and I was not doing any marathons and had a game of Just Dance with the kids and was sweating my fat moobs off. How the mighty have fallen or should that be expanded ?

Speaking of waistlines this week is one of my favourite sporting events and The Masters golf tournament. Fine memories of watching this event with my dad as a child and my elder sister coming in after Sunday night on the ale and bringing us some chips in for a late night Sunday feast. Anyway the winner of The Masters gets to choose what is on the menu at next years champions dinner. Last years champion was Patrick Reed. So what did he go for ? Apparently he had known what his masters meal would be from the age of 13. It was bone in rib-eye, mac and cheese, creamed spinach, creamed corn and Caeser salad. Not sure what I would have done if I was at the meal being a self proclaimed salad dodger. Who thinks of that scran age 13 ? Dessert was chocolate crunch and praline cheesecake. So when I win the Masters, well I do play golf on the Xbox 360 every week what would my Masters Club Dinner be in honour of the champion Neil George Fay

Starters

Chips

Main Meal

A Tesco finest quarter pounder with caramelised red onion (Who said I was fussy eh) with Chips

Sides

Sausage rolls from Porkie Pies in Garston Village and a selection of finest sausages from Cowmans sausage shop in Clitheroe (Do try both if you get the chance)

Desserts

Twix Cheesecake and a make your own McFlurry machine.

I can see you all praying I win the Masters tournament one year.

Masters Meal 2019 in honour of Patrick Reed

In other news the UK divorce laws are to change to end the blame game. In future I will sorry I mean people will only have to state that the marriage has broken down irretrievably. No need for Mrs Fay to get a cob on if I want to watch the champions league in the living room as BT Sport is not on the Sky Multi room TV.  She can simply just go online now and file for a no fault divorce. She could even join the other 13 people who last chrimbo day filed for divorce.

In more divorce news this week The world’s richest man, Amazon founder Jeff Bezos, and his wife MacKenzie have agreed a record-breaking divorce settlement of at least $35bn (£27bn). Closer to home Chris and Colin Weir, who scooped £161m on the EuroMillions in 2011, also confirmed in a statement they had been living apart “for some time”. The couple from Largs in Ayrshire, have been married for more than 30 years and have two grown-up children. I always say to Mrs Fay I don’t want to win the lottery as it would bring questions and doubts that you could never imagine. I would like somebody else to win it though and give me a fee bob. Give me health over wealth any day. How sad a 71 and 62 year old split up after the win of their dreams.

And finally I was having a lovely evening spring walk the other night in Sefton Park and was taking in the lovely ambience with a walk around the lake when some kids come running down the grass hill hurtling towards the lake. Luckily they stopped and avoided a dip in the lake but I overheard their mum saying “Stay away from that lake. Yer uncle Ian fell in there once and turned green for two weeks” ha ha ha.

Peace

Fay x x x x x x x x x x

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