The Fay Family Holiday 2018 – Pontins (Southport)

So we were all up last Thursday nice and early to catch the first Merseryrail train to Southport for The Fay Family holiday to Pontins (Southport) It had been a tough year as a freelance worker but I counted up the 5p jar and the family needed a much needed pick me up so I treated them to a holiday. In reality the 5p jar is empty but thanks to credit cards “tarting” it was a week in Cyprus and a return to Avanti Village in Cyprus where we went in 2015. There is a whole wide world out there and I dont like going back to places but the kids enjoyed it and with only going for a week we could dive straight into holiday mode without having to find out where to go in the resort etc so made a return visit.

So with the flight out going all as planned and the kids amazed at TV’s in the seat in front (Even if there were like something from the year 2000) we were eventually in the pool for about 4pm and time for a beer at the swim up bar showing off my newly Veeted (Immac for old skoolers) back to stop me looking like a cousin of Chewbakka. Once that was done it was time to head the supermarket and stock up on Keo beer and munchies. To my amazement there were no Jamon Ruffles. The highlight of any previous family holiday is sitting on the veranda half pissed on a balmy evening in just my shorts scoffing a Jamon Ruffles crisp butty. Then when finished locating several dropped ruffles in my chest hair (Cant shave that off as it would show how big my moobs are) and having a second helping of Ruffles.

So the first proper full day Friday and I was dragged out by the kids to get some lilo’s. Now the world of lilo’s has moved on since I were a lad and you just got a red one (For Liverpool) and it cost about 200 Pesetas. This years trend was the unicorn lilo coming it at around 30 Euro’s. Now I have three daughters and wasn’t spending 90 Euro’s on bloody lilo’s thus denting The Desperados kitty and after many shops outing for prices and varieties I got them down to a smaller Pink Flamingo and a Whale. Flamingo made it home but the Whale burst on day 1 !! Some of the lilo’s stretched into the 50 euro’s bracket (Giant grapefruits and double ringed Unicorns) Based on the lilo’s for sale I roughly calculated that 5% of the GDP of Cyprus is from the sales of lilos.

Now the Germans historically get stick for putting towels on the sunbeds early doors but as this was a very much UK and family orientated complex you had to get up early putting a towel out and if there were any Germans on site they would have been as shocked about that as their early World Cup exit. In other towel news on the apartments opposite and above there was a Manchester United versus Liverpool “Towel off”

As the days just merged into one of a nice morning stroll on my own, playing in the pool. Beers at the swim up bar around 5pm and then out for something to eat and drink memories of the holiday all blur into one. We did let the eldest have a “Sex on the beach” which was accompanied by a traditional dad joke about it and I did manage a bit of time on my own as reward for keeping the kids entertained in the pool. This mainly involved footy and one bar had that many games on a Saturday afternoon I appreciated the job that Jeff Stelling does on sky keeping it all together as goals were flying in everywhere. I of course had the pleasure of United getting beat whilst noticing Mixed Fruit Koppaberg abroad is about 5.3% compared to the 4.0% piss we get ??

We split the week up by having a day at the water park. Mrs Fay was brave enough to go on a few of the more less thrill seeking rides. I had a go on everything. On one of the tamest rides I managed to end up going backwards most the way on my rubber ring ending the ride with a 360 somersault to finish. The young Cypriot attendant ran over with a look of worry on his face and said “Are you alright sir” to which I just shook some water off and cooly said “Yeah no problem” whilst inside thinking “Fucking hell I might have been inches from a wheelchair then” Funny how when you get older the fear (And danger) of everything creeps in. I did of course go on the kamikaze etc and think being a hefty 6ft 3 frame added velocity to everything I went on in the waterpark and as I found out the morning after the water park I must have had internal bruising of both my upper arse cheeks thanks to the more danger rides !!

So with one night local and then the next night down at the harbour area the 7 days soon quickly passed but I am always happy to come home after 7 days. Coming home all was looking good as the plane we were due to get had left Manchester but by the time we got to the airport it was a three hour delay as the out coming flight had to return to Manchester not long after a technical fault occurred. It was at that point I thought me and Mrs Fay should really make a will though I did not pass this thought onto Mrs Fay who doesn’t like flying. After all I would hate you all to be fighting over who gets what when we had died a tragic death and after all my gadgets had been sold off there was still one credit card and half my overdraft still outstanding.

Lovely to have quality time with just the five of us. Mrs Fay was mostly well behaved for the 7 days apart from a few moments and the kids also behaved most of the time. So in the end thanks to a speedy turn around of the plane (No new food and drink loaded) they managed to keep the delay under three hours so no compo claim. I did queue up for the 8 euros each for us all though sadly as I was driving when we got to Manchester I couldn’t spend the 40 Euros on several pints of Keo and instead had to water and feed the sprogs !

Crash bang wallop and Friday decked out in tracksuit bottoms (First time my legs have been covered up for months) and my raincoat I headed out in the chilly 12c hoping to dodge the heavy showers and was soon picking dog shit up on Sudley Field again. I consoled myself with a sausage roll from Sayers before I commence the 18th diet of 2018. I did manage to get a “Sausage Pie” on holiday but this was jarg and was a hot dog in a pastry roll but at least things are heading in the right direction on the foreign sausage roll front.


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Just say no kids (And original Ronaldo)

So walking the dogs up Sudley Field the other evening and there were some kids spinning around inhaling a substance out of a balloon. The effects must of lasted about 15 seconds and to be honest I reckon they would have has a better laugh if they just inhaled a bit and spoke to each other in high pitched voice like everybody does with the balloons tied to bag of sand disguised in a pretty box that are on tables at the end of a wedding when bladdered. It is such a shame how society is breaking down and the youth of 2018 are resorting to such shennanagins for entertainment. When I were a lad back in 1990 I would have been up Sudley Field with my posse after security at the IM Marsh security over the road couldn’t take any more of our antics. We wouldn’t have resorted to such things as balloons. No we were far too pre occupied with getting slaughtered on a litre bottle of Stock Bianco (A poor mans Cinzano Bianco) and singing along to Deacon Blue songs (Maybe thats what tipped the IM Marsh security boys over the edge) and then having a bop to “Ride On Time’ by Black Box. Using our creative juices literally to use a few 10p carton drinks as mixer and doubling up as a glass to neck our Stock Bianco out of. What must the dogs walkers of the 1990’s thought of our antics ? Saying “When I were a lad we used to just go the local milk bar for a jive” Now I am the dog walker. Next time I am gonna go up to them and say “Giz a go otherwise I will tell yer auld fella” but only do a small bit of the ballon and in a voice similar to Joe Pasquale say “This is shit here’s a litre of Stock Bianco” do a high pitched giggle and walk down the hill back to ours shouting back “Search for Pump Up The Jam by Technotronic on Spotify on your phone kidda’s”

In other drug related news is seems that original Ronaldo has been hospitalised in Ibiza with Flu. Yeah we have all been there Ronny. The old Ibiza “Flu” Ronaldo assured fans on social media on Sunday that he was fine and would soon be ready to go home after suffering “a heavy bout of flu” I wonder what club he went to on the Saturday night ? Or was he hardcore and been out since Friday ? Guess we will never know as what goes on in Ibiza stays in Ibiza. Get well soon Ronny and enjoy your Lemsip just don’t try and snort it ! Funny enough it comes exactly a year ago since I came out of retirement and went to Ibiza Read about it here

As the football season is back after football never came home and another little bit of me died on Sunday despite a Liverpool win and going top of the league. I liked the old days when the first table was produced after about 3 games. Also there is no need to be putting lines on for qualification and relegation again in the old days when these popped on on the graphics you knew it was the business end of the season. Anyway I spotted on the digital advertising around the ground Petro-Canada Lubricants “Liverpool’s official lubricant partner” Jesus I know football fans are getting screwed over all the time but do they need official lubricants now to ease the pain of being fisted for cash from their team. Again I preferred the old days of a Davy Liver taxi advertising in the corner. In fact I think I just prefer the old days. Speaking of which I am off to crack open the litre bottle of Stock Bianco I have bought. If you live in the Aigburth Vale area of Liverpool listen out for a merry man singing Deacon Blue songs echoing around the enogs of Aigburth “Can this white man sing the blooooooooooooos”


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It’s a In-tree-guing blog

Just the one tree pun I promise. Well whilst walking the dogs yesterday lunchtime I noticed that the dead tree on Sudley Field was getting cut down. To be fair bits of it were falling off every time it was windy and I had visions of it toppling onto me due to a rotten core. So by the time I went on the evening dog walk the dead tree was no more and all that was left was the stump and a large part of the trunk. It was attracting attention of fellow dog walkers on the field. I will post a few pictures and first up is the tree in all its dead glory earlier on in the year. Second up is the tree as it looked this evening and finally a picture of the cross section of the stump. As ever click the image for a larger version.

Luckily enough somebody had already been as sad as me and wanted to try out some dendrochronology and attempted to count the rings and it was put at around 100 years old. You can see on the cross section that the older the tree got the less it grew. The darker rings indicate growth towards the end of the summer. Mad to think that this tree was not more than a sapling when my nan was born in 1915. I played junior football on Sudley Field in the mid 1980’s and no doubt many of my shots would have hit this tree (indicated by a small ring growth !! ) Anyway on the opposite side of the field are some now medium size trees. I actually remember these being planted around 1982 as they were staked and we used two of them as a goal !! Nearly 40 years later these bastard trees remind me of how old I am. Indeed you know your knocking on a bit when you start measuring your life in trees. So there you go I have gone all Swampy Eco Warrior on you but it was an intriguing start to this blog.

The next decision of the evening was do I go for a jog or go the chippy for my tea ? Run the chippy was suggested to me on Twitter but I went for a nice evening stroll anyway and was that warm I didn’t fancy chippy anyway in the end ! I ended up walking around Sefton Park for a bit marvelling at the massive houses around the perimeter and thinking I would love to live in one of these. The wife, three daughters and me would have plenty of room and if I positioned myself correctly in the house it was that big that I could actually think I live on my own and have no noise from aforementioned wife and three kids and we could meet in the dining room for meals and then I could return to my “boys room” loft or cellar ! There was a lovely pink sunset over Lark Lane and when walking down there I was accosted by a man in an electric wheelchair asking for a pound to put towards a taxi. I only had sports clobber on so had no pockets with money in and thankfully beggars haven’t yet entered the world of contactless payments. I made my excuses and walked on. It then dawned on me was I being arlarse in thinking hang on a minute mate you are sitting in a personal electric taxi ?? Anyway he was soon razzing over the other side of the late trying to bum a pound from somebody else. Perhaps I was being too harsh not knowing his full issues ? Speaking of issues on Sunday I posted and sent something and as I was doing it I actually made myself laugh. Is this the first sign of insanity or is it good to make yourself laugh ? Am I that funny that you are laughing with me. Or are you now laughing at me as I laugh at myself. Am I laughing now ? These questions and many others will be answered on the next Faymondo Blog.

Final mention for Barry Chuckle and the only thing getting me through this tragic loss is that the fat Chuckle is still alive. Hope for me yet !!


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A Cultural Review Of Glasgow

A bonus edition of the now famous “A Cultural Review Of ……….” Previous editions can be found by clicking the links Wroclaw   Riga Tallinn Krakow Warsaw Hamburg Stuttgart Douglas Berlin and the bonus editions Benllech Edinburgh 

So the excuse occasion this time was that my 66 year old father in law has just retired from work. It would be a whole new blog going through what jobs he has had but the later period of his life was spent being a teacher. But thats it now. He finished on Wednesday and we dragged him to Glasgow on Friday. Not sure what he is going to do with his time now (I need a bike shed building) but I am sure he will keep himself busy with his hobby of bike riding (I need a bike shed building) So with the sole aim of getting him ending up wearing a kilt and one of those tartan hats with inbuilt ginger wig did we manage it ? Read on. Luckily enough I was able to go but had to put off that bike shed construction I had planned.

So with Lime St being shut we arranged to meet at Prescot station and had a beer on the platform to send us on our way. A change at Wigan and another beer en route we were in Preston with plenty of time to spare and met two of the other lads and had a couple of pints in Preston and couple of beers to carry onto the Glasgow train and at 8pm the magnificent seven were in Glasgow. Desperate for the toilet we refused to spend 40p in Glasgow station for a piss but instead ended up going to an expensive boozer instead. After working out we were going in the wrong direction for the hotel we got back en route and stopped off for a pint in The Grant Arms and come across our first interaction with the locals. Walking in behind the couple they were on the verge of splitting up but must have patched things up before they got the the bar and after a chat with them they described one of the magnificent 7 as “Pot Ugly” the other six of us managed to pick ourselves off the floor due to laughter and all secretly breathed a large sigh of relief it wasn’t us. I had planned on having a moment listening to “Raintown” by Deacon Blue whilst walking around Glasgow in the rain. That dream soon passed and all it seemed to do on Friday night was piss down. I did manage a rendition of “Dignity” with one of the lads on karaoke and we were dodging in and out of the rain en route to more pubs. The rain was that bad that we had a first for one of our cultural review trips and we had to purchase some umbrellas out of the kitty !! So we ended up at some bar with a 3am closing time and got kicked out of there about 3.15am and it was time to sway home in the rain stopping off for some chips on the way home. The latter bit of the evening is a blur.

So I had boxed myself off a nice double bed and having fell into bed around 3.45am I was soon wide awake not long after 8am. What the hell was all that about. Luckily there was no hangover as I was obviously still pissed. I headed off to Wetherspoons for breakfast and a bottle of Mixed fruit Koppaberg purely for thirst reasons and off we headed back on it for Saturday’s adventures. To keep us of the ale we decided we were going to head up to watch Partick Thistle play. We got on the Glasgow underground which for some reason seemed like a miniature railway and a couple of stops later and a small walk we were in a boozer with some of the home fans and we necked a few before the match in The Woodside Inn. So we got to the stadium with plenty of time to avoid the rush and it was only £12 to get in. Or £6 if you were an old bastard as somebody was. Inside the ground there was no ale on sale so I consoled myself with a very tasty Partick thistle official club sausage roll. Pre match there was a scary official mascot and some poor defending has the visitors Ayr United one up. The attendance was 2,871 though this was at least 7 down for the second half as we all decided to bail to the pub due to thirst and it being quite windy in the stand and we had only just dried out from the Friday night. For the record the result was Partick 0 Ayr 2. The next boozer up was The Munns Vaults and again we met one of Glasgows more interesting characters.

Link Here For Video

So outside we had a chat with our Scottish raver who was called Duncan. He even let me have a listen to what was playing (Dance music surprise surprise) and he adopted one of our gang as “wee man” and said he was now like family. A lovely fella but just absolutely mad !!

So taxis into town again and we went a bar that had let us in for one last 11pm drink on the Friday and this time it was full and we ended up in a jukebox singalong with some young Scott’s. We then headed to The Horseshoe to see if we could get the Liverpool game on but it was not to be  and so we watched the boxing instead. As the night wore on I was feeling the 4hrs 21 min sleep I had the night before after 12 hours on the grog and decided to bail. Dont get me wrong I was pissed again but just knackered and bailed home just after 12am and with some chips on the way home again was back in the hotel not long after. Things are never easy bevvied and trying to get in my room my card wouldn’t work. I went downstairs and he boxed off my key. But alas after another hike to the 6th floor it didnt work. Back downstairs again and he must have just taken one last look at my weary pissed face and he escorted me upstairs and let me in my room.

On Saturday night I did manage a more respectable 7 hours 38 of sleep and with another Wetherspoon’ breakfast we were in the station and ready to head home. Now if I had only received a pound for every time I was called “Big Man” in Glasgow I would be rich. Just one last bit of drama and we had to sprint at Wigan to avoid missing our train to Liverpool and made it with about 1 minute to spare as the seven of us were out of breath and ale oozing out of sweaty bodies after the “Wigan dash” So that was that. No time to mention “Token birds” or whatever “Eddie on the door was” (I cant remember) Again another belter couple of days and Glasgow was a great city and we only just scratched the surface of it meeting some nice people and some memorable people. Time to recover from two days hardcore drinking and dream of a bike shed. Happy retirement to my father in law Dave and here he is below at the match with his eldest son Eddie (On the right) and we didnt managed a kilt and tartan hat with ginger wig. But there are six of us proud as punch as we are not “Pot Ugly”


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The evolution of the Liverpool street sign.

So as I get older and mature I recognise the significance of things around me and over recent years I have found an obscure interest in Liverpool street signs. The blog I originally had planned would have been “The History Of Liverpool Street Signs” but alas I never got around to going to library to do some research. So after going on an afternoon walk today as my systems in work were down I decided to take some pictures of Liverpool street signs and bang this blog out. First up there are 4 main versions on Liverpool street signs. I was hoping to get a street with all four versions on but three is the best I could manage. If by the end of reading this blog you know of a road with all four on please leave a comment below.

Version 1

As you can see below version one signs (Mk1) use the traditional cast iron signage but have the  black letters inverted. These I assume are the original street signs and can be located in town and more local to me there are a few in Garston Village and one at the top of Riversdale Road and the example below Elmswood Road (Click on image for larger version) I think these would be dated late 1800’s or very early 1900’s. These do not have any red postal area lettering on.

Version 2

For now the most common street sign and still using the traditional cast iron signage but the lettering protrudes outwards and also the red postal area is in use on these signs. Sadly many of these signs are now being taken down and replaced with the version 4. Back not so long ago the council would have had a selection of skilled people who would go around and repaint these signs. In use from the early 1900’s I dont know when these signs were stopped being used but they are the sign we mostly know. As you can see below this sign will be over 100 years old but still hanging on despite not being painted for a fair few years. Luckily a person who has one on their house in the same road has repainted theirs and with just a bit of tender love and care here signs could last for another hundred years. I actually bought one of these signs from eBay but need to hang it up in the back yard. So below you can the uncared and cared for Mk2 sign and the one I have in my back yard I bought off eBay. When I eventually hang it I think I will leave it in a state of disrepair.

Version 3

I think the next signs started to appear from the 60’s onwards and gone is the cast iron and in comes a cheaper metal plate version but no change in the design. Cheap and cheerful they are still going today and most still in good condition and would have very low maintenance costs. Again I managed to use Elmswood Road which was just missing the Mk2 version for the full house.

Version 4

And finally onto the modern day version. Cheap, nasty and poorly designed. I think it sums us up as a society that the street signs of over 100 years ago (Mk1 & Mk2) are better than what we put up today. These new plastic versions popping up all over the place and replacing the Mk 2 versions often turn what I can only describe as a “piss stained” yellow and fade after a few years of use (See below)

Not only that I think they need to retrain their designers as my hidden inner OCD screams at me when walking past many of them. I mean come on its not that hard to make them look good to the eye. The one below is taking the piss and even then one above could have North just a bit over and L18 moved to the end aghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

So when you next see a Liverpool street sign you can play the what version it is game and also see if you can spot a rare Mk 1 version. There are some rogue street signs about that I will take pictures of and post an updated blog on here and I will get around to doing a bit more research on the dates etc of the original signs but for now I hope you have enjoyed this educational blog its not all booze and sausages rolls on here. My next nerdy blog will be about the sandstone walls of South Liverpool. Look about so many of them once you notice them and many falling to bits but they must have marked important boundaries back in the day. I will never do it as there will be far too much research involved but maybe one day you never know.


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Anybody who reads this who knows more about these street signs please do post as I would be very interested to hear about them.

Congratulations Croatia. It was never coming home and swinging tales. I just went home.

So thats it just over 4 and a half weeks on the ale is over. The world cup has finished and congratulations to our champions Croatia. I say Croatia as alongside the world cup I have used a trusty excel sheet (Well numbers as I am a Mac snob) world cup wall chart and played my now infamous soccer dice version of the 2018 world cup. England were well more like England and got knocked out in the final 16 by Poland and lets be honest real England were not much better but with a lucky draw somehow managed to get to the semi finals. Don’t get me wrong I was made up as I managed three nights out to watch them. Last time we got to a semi final I was just 16 this time around I am 44 and at my age semi’s are a rare thing though I do believe you can get pills to sort these kind of issues out. Must enquire next time I am getting some Tena Ladies for Mrs Fay. As a man who kept singles and album charts from 1989 to around 1997 I cant believe I haven’t been holding soccer dice world cups since 1986 when I got my first set of soccer dice. Anyway you can guarantee the soccer dice world cup will now be held every four years and run alongside collecting the panini world cup stickers (Yes another full album) Anyway below is how the knockout phase worked out and as for England it was never really coming home but it was a good ride whilst it lasted.

So ita ll been happening this week with Brexit (It still wont happen) and the visit of Donald Trump. I think the picture below sums it up with Philip May thinking how come I didn’t pull a bird like the Big D ? Hoping that when the keys go into the pot later on in the evening at Chequers he might be up all night to get lucky. That reminds me of the time me and Mrs Fay started our naughty forties and were at a dinner party (I had a plain burger and chips) and it got to that time of the evening when the keys went into the bowl. Personally I was hoping it was a draw for a car and we could replace our battered Vauxhall Meriva with my mates Mercedes. But it was some kind of wife swapping game. I must admit I was very excited. No not in that way. I am always fond of a good draw and remember bunking out at lunch from Calderstones School to scoff a sneaky Sayers in the enog (Back Alleyway) behind Sayers and listen to our mini transistor radio see who Liverpool drew in the third round FA Cup Draw. So back to the car key draw. To cut a long story short me an Mrs Fay’s keys were the last two left in the tupperware bowl so we drew each other. So much for our naught forties. We left the dinner party and got the cab to stop at the garage on the way home were we both found a new partner for the remainder of the evening. I got a Twix and Mrs Fay a Fruit & Nut and we got home and had a pleasurable experience scoffing our new chocolate bar partners and then went to bed.

Some good news this week and the rescue of the Thai boys stuck down a cave. Nice to see a happy ending for once and with people going on about Englands football heroes I know who my heroes of the week are and its those divers who saved the kids but sadly lost one of their own in the rescue attempt.

So today sees another rescue attempt as I attempt to rescue my expanding waist line (after a world cup final BBQ and booze yesterday) after a massive post marathon blow out during the world cup. It will be a month until my holiday in Cyprus and I can already feel (and see) my beer gut coming back. The good news is I am still running 6 miles easily and have joined a gym so all should be good in the attempt to get my marathon figure back. But my marathon running figure is that of a fat bastard and not a very fat bastard ha ha. I haven’t bothered to step on the scales on injustice as I did not want to ruin my world cup but I stepped on them this morning and I think they have broke as the numbers are higher than I expected and the Speedo Challenge 2018 has started. Wish me luck as I will need it as I am at a family party next weekend and then away for a weekend in Glasgow to celebrate my father in law retiring so expect another of the now famous “A Cultural Review Of” blogs about our weekend in Glasgow in a fortnights time. Anyway just got the ball rolling by treating my beautiful wife to a place in The English Half Marathon on September 16th. I know I spoil her rotten. Just settling down to see what game is on tonight. What you mean its finished ? No booze and footy on a school night. Ahhh well nailed a 6 mile jog on my lunch hour and has alphabet spaghetti for tea. Back on it indeed !!


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Happy 9th Birthday Faymondo’s Blog — Garstonbury 2018

So here we are 9 years after my first blog LINK HERE I am still churning this bollocks out and people are still reading it. People subscribe to it and most amazingly people give me nice feedback about the blog so on it goes. To think I was in my mid 30’s when I started writing this thing and now I am hurtling towards my mid 40’s. The years have seen deaths, births and divorces though not me. Well not yet but my love of The World Cup is testing things as I have hardly missed a bit of it and England progressing means another session on the ale. Today Holly my youngest I completed my 2018 Panini World Cup album to add to the full collections of World Cups and Euro’s since 2010. My world cup wall chart is getting updated nearly as soon as the games finish and this year I have been doing my own world cup with the youngest using the soccer dice though England have been already knocked out in that one and just like the real tournament it wont be coming home. Last night I was in a boozer up in Woolton (The Cobden) to watch a poor England side progress to the quarter finals and now meet another poor side in Sweden. I was made up England won though mostly to satisfy the alcoholic in me as it means another session on the ale on Saturday and who doesn’t love a bevy in this heat. I might of has enough last night as after only my third bevy the barman had got my order in and not got mine. I said “And a bottle of Merrydown as well please mate” as he then just looked at me like I had arrived off a spaceship from Mars. After an akward pause the felt like years it dawned on me that Merrydown (Cider) was a drink I used to get pissed on 30 year ago down Otterspool Prom and it was actually a Magners I wanted. Maybe that was my brain saying a week on the ale and you need to lay off it son. Things are going a bit insane in my life as yesterday we had a 4th birthday party for the dog and my 13 year old daughter has finally come down from her loft and actually speak and not grunt to Mrs Fay though sadly any advantage from this new development is fully offset by the fact they are watching Love Island together.

So the blog’s birthday was actually yesterday but the dog hogged all celebrations so a delayed celebratory post this evening. Expecting to be hung over today I had booked a day off work but actually only had about 6 pints. So I walked the dogs early before the crazy heatwave we are having kicked in with its full effect. I then had a lovely walk down Otterspool and had a breakfast outside in the sunshine and then went to the gym which I joined on Monday. As it was hot I went down to the gym in full running gear as its light and comfy to wear. When signing up the woman said are you going straight in to which I replied “Nah signing up is enough effort for one day and I need to be back for the evening footy match and finish off the bottle of vodka I have before the health kick starts” Anyway another sign was presented to me as when filling in the membership form I completed my name as Mr Fat. She pointed this out to me as she was about to give me my membership card and asked if I wanted to change it. I did tell her really that should be inspiration for me to not change it but come back in three months time and ask for it to be updated to Mr Thin but as there is no chance of that happening so Mr Fay will do. So I done about an hours cardio today in my first visit to the gym for 10 years. I would like to say it was great but it wasn’t.

The weekends highlight was a friends party names “Garstonbury” and no expense was spared and I spared my liver no expense. Dancing in the garden to “Billie Jean” at 2m on a balmy summers evening is always good. As you can see by the way the pictures are going its a case of what went on in Garstonbury stays in Garstonbury.


Final thought for the day and today I woke up with the news of kids killing kids. What the fuck is going on ? Where is all this heading ? Grim very fucking grim !!

So the observant amomgs you will notice as we enter the 10th year of the blog and extra kiss is added to the sign off and the blog has a new look. Thanks for reading and here is to year 10 of this shite.



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Fundraising review. Thank you all so very very much x x

So for non regular readers of this mighty fine blog you will not know that the first part of the year was taken up with training for the London marathon. This escalated into a three marathon challenge and Manchester was before and Liverpool after. Anyway illness meant it was just a half marathon for Liverpool but Manchester was completed BLOG HERE and so was London BLOG HERE To spur me on during those tough training moments I decided I was going to run for charity and with a friend of ours having a daughter the lovely Lois who has cerebral palsy which effects all four limbs. She is unable to walk or support herself and her ability to communicate is limited. Millstead School aims to provide the very best learning and development opportunities for children like Lois who have severe learning and mobility difficulties. The school offers a personalised learning journey for each child, including sensory environments, music sessions and learning activities that focus on developing her communication and motor and decision making skills. Lois particularly enjoys the sensory, trampoline, music and swimming sessions hosted at the school. Donations would assist the school in purchasing vital equipment and continuing to provide Lois and other children with the learning support they need.

As I write this with temperatures nudging 27c it seems along way from the training days of -2c with a windchill of nearer -10c as a couple of “The beasts from the east” hit the UK last winter. It was during some of these runs that the challenge of running for charity really helps you along knowing that you are going to do some good when my legs and freezing fat face was telling me to go home. The training went perfect as did Manchester with the heat of London (The hottest London marathon on record) adding its own problems but I achieved the goal I set myself. Fund-raising wise I had set myself a goal of £500 for the school. So as my running season ended and the fundraising page closed I emailed the school and asked if when I came in to hand the cheque over could I have a quick look around the school. The reply was great. Not only could I have a tour of the school I was asked to present the sports day medals for the kids.

So I headed in on Friday to the school and was taken on a tour around the class rooms and the amazing facilities the school has such as sensory rooms, its own swimming room and a great canteen/space for the kids. Not forgetting the outdoor area and to be honest there was a lot to take in on one visit. I wasn’t expecting the school to be so big and the number of staff involved on a day to day basis. I popped into a classroom and some of the kids were telling me on how they had been to Liverpool FC to see a game (The club is brilliant with them) It was then into the hall for the sports day presentation with classes adopting countries and performing a closing ceremony before me and my mate (Moses) who’s child attends the school gave each class their sports days medals. At least there wasn’t a George Osborne 2012 Olympic moment and I wasn’t boo’d and it was quite the opposite and I was made very welcome by all the staff and children I met. I even asked for a medal for myself as you can see in the picture below my wall of fame is ever growing with a total of 47 medals over the last few years. Today I added number 48 and if I am honest the pleasure I got from handing out those medals and some of the looks on the children faces makes the 48th medal the most special one of my collection.

So after Just Giving took their cut and I added on the monies I was passed cash in hand the final total raised for Millstead School was £1562.55 That is mind-blowing to me and thank you all very so much from the bottom of my heart. It makes the efforts of the last few months worth it. From friends and family to people connected with the school and even many donations from random followers of my @Liverpoolweath account on Twitter its a great total and one the school will put to so many good things. The school will be inviting me back again to show me what was purchased. I have said no more marathons but maybe when I am 50 in 2023 I will run the New York marathon and do some fundraising again for the school. Maybe it will go viral and I will raise enough for a whole wing to be named after me ha ha. Still feel like I missed out on a trick not having one of those giants cheques you see on Children In need though.

So thanks to Millstead school for inviting me in and to all those who donated and gave me well wishes when training etc. I have had a post marathon blow out month of June and its time to cut down the beer and munchies and get back on it. Though I have retired from full marathons (This is now the third time I have said that !!!! )


Fay x x x x x x x x x

World Cup Fever #Itscominghome (My Arse) Memories 82-14

Wake me up is it over ? It is and the “easy” path to the world cup opens up. I love the World Cup and class this as my 10th world cup as my earliest memories are from Espana 82 and its mascot which I thought was Pedro The orange but apparently its Naranjito. I remember my mum buying The England World Cup squad picture disc 7″ single “This time we’ll get it right” its 2018 and still no sign of getting it right. There is a big Scouse not English movement on Liverpool. Well I love the world cup and I support England. I have for as long as I remember been hanging a flag out of the window. That said I am not overly arsed when we get beat. Vague memories of watching the final with my dad in the front room as we had an extra TV rented for a month but they had not come to collect it on time so it stayed for the final. My auld man must not have had any faith in England getting a free trial rental for a month. The TV even had Teletext on but alas it went back and teletext didnt arrive in the Fay household until the late 80’s. Oh and England went out in some strange 2nd group phase but who didn’t love the Tango españa ball.

Mexico 86 and memories from that include a free wall chart and stickers from the local Cellar 5 off licence. My mum was in there that often buying vodka and 20 Craven A that I had wall charts coming out of my ears and had numerous sponge footy world cups in my back garden. As for the footy its laying down on the couch watching Maradona have us off and a spirited comeback but just not enough. I also remember some strange shadow on the Azteca pitch which I believe was just shadows from a speaker system ? Watched the final with my dad in ours.

Italia 90. Well 1990 the best year of my life and the best world cup of my life. I had broken up from school for my GCSE’s and it was a summer to remember. Those Italian TV graphics stick in my mind. As for England well I watched the match in my sisters with my then girlfriend as I was looking after my nephew. After shouting at the TV “Shilton wont get near any of these” I was proved right and went for a walk around the block as we got beat on penalties and then most probably came back into the house and tried to get past first base with my girlfriend. A second defeat of the evening. Didnt watch the final and played footy with my mates instead on “The Oldies” a nursing home on Victoria Road/Aigburth Vale now flats though the trees that we used for goals survived.

USA 94  Big holiday to Faliraki with about 20 of us and we would be there for the final. Living the dream oh that ended up being the one we didnea qualify for. So remember watching some matches around midnight which was boss. Diana Ross missed a sitter and watched the final in Georges bar in Falaraki. Aldo had a kick off and thats all I can remember.

France 98. Opening game Brazil v Scotland and I watched it in a bar in Times Square New York. I remember having to get uo at breakfast for an England Game. Watched England get beat on penalties by The Argies in Slaters. Bouncer turned the TV off when Owen made it 2-1 saying no throwing ale when we score (Fair shout as I have never got that) but a riot was on the cards and he quickly put the TV back on shitting himself. Was working for Ladbrokes at the time so I was getting paid to watch games. Just watched the final in my nans house where I was living at the time (Now our house)

South Korea & Japan 02. Weird times but I then worked for Liverpool City Council and they had set up a TV room as long as you logged off work for lunch. I also remember a giant screen in Williamson Square. England got beat by Brazil and you thought Shilton was poor then Seaman kept the tradition going. Watched it at about 06:30 am in a pub in Aigburth Vale. At the end of the match the chokka pub virtually emptied and me and my mates had booked a day off work so stayed on the ale. I remember playing jingles early afternoon, going the bookies about 3pm and being unable to write anything that was possible to read on a betting slip and waiting for Steves chippy to open at 4.30pm to have chips and go to bed after 10 hours on the ale. I brought my nan some surprise chips and and the next day she said I was pissed and telling her how much I love her. At least I am a lover not a fighter. Actually moved house in with my future Mrs on the final weekend and watched the final on a fuzzy colour portable TV !!

Germany 06. Even though not that long ago mot many fond memories of this. I was in The Walkabout (Why ??) when England crashed out on penalties and the winking Ronaldo. I watched the final with my dad in a sports bar on Sir Thomas Street when Zidane does his thing.

South Africa 2010 marked the return of me collecting Panini Stickers again via my eldest daughter and yes I completed the album. As for memories I was at my first Glastonbury festival and England Played Germany. What a moment I thought if we won and with all those people. Anyway Germany twatted us and as my tent was near in the end I just ended up listening to the lat bit. Just to take the piss a bit more I missed Ray Davies (Kinks), Slash and Dr John for that shite. Just watched the final in ours memorable for Howard Webb shitting a red card. Oh and Spain won a team I had been betting on since 1990 when I had to pretend I was 18 in my local William Hills when popping out on lunch from School (I was 16) but being a manboy I was fine and still down on Spain despite this win !

Brasil 2014 and another full Panini album. Ahh Roy Hodgson as a Liverpool fan I knew what was coming and he got an extension !! I need his agent to get this blog known worldwide. Only memory is falling asleep watching the Brazil v Germany match on my bed on the iPad and waking up and it was 7-0 !! I assume I watched the final in ours. Funny on how closer the world cup is the more my memory goes ?

So that it 2018 to be wrote but on checking how much my 7″ picture disc vinyl of the 1982 England World Cup Squad song ‘This time we’ll get it right” is worth (About £1) I stumbled across the album “This time” you tube video below. I thought Diamond Lights was Glenn Hoddle’s first venture into music but check out 08:38 “We are the champions” by Glen Hoddle was. Ray Clemance tells the story of “The Road To Spain” at 20:02. But the highlight lowlight is at 24:00 with Viv Anderson & Trevor Francis with a rendition of “You’ll Never Walk Alone” wow. I am gonna have to get a copy of this for my vinyl collection though imagine what the neighbours would think when I am blasting it out whilst working.

Random thought for the day “France’s Macron brings back national service and you have to put a Bakewell Tart on yer head”



Fay x x x x x x x x x



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